SuperMansion Unlimited
by Star Saber21
Summary: The League of Freedom sets out to recruit new heroes. They will meet some of the best, and some they really wish they hadn't.
1. The Quest For More Funding

**Welcome to my Supermansion story, and the very first Supermansion story to be posted on Fanfiction. If you have not seen Supermansion, I highly recommend you watch it, not only will you know that characters, the show is hilarious. The main character is voiced by Bryan Cranston. If you decide to read this first then fair warning, MAJOR spoilers ahead. A big thank you to Just Q, who came with the name of this story.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Supermansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.**

 **Supermansion Unlimited**

Within Storm City stood the Supermansion. Built by the United States government, it served as the home and base of operation for the League of Freedom. A team of superheroes who have been protecting the world since World War 2. The heroes were currently facing a challenge greater than any super villain, trying to get more funding.

"Come on Steve Jobs!" Rex yelled into the phone. "The League of Freedom has been protecting this country since before they invented regular cell phones. Oh I don't know, how about since if it wasn't for me and my team, you never would have had a chance to make your first iPhone. Because the world would have been destroyed. Now I don't think showing a little appreciation by sponsoring the League would hurt. What!? FINE! I am gonna get one of those phones that catch fire when someone calls, stick in down your pants and then call it!" With that he hung up and muttered, "asshole."

"We're back." Lex and Robobot entered the kitchen, the latter was wearing his suit and wig.

"How'd it go?" Rex asked.

"Not great." Lex replied.

"We met with the CEO of Empire Enterprises." Robobot began. "We spoke of all the good the League has done since it was founded and how he could help ensure the futures safety by becoming a sponsor."

"And what did he say?" Rex asked.

"He said that my costume would look better on his office floor." Lex said bluntly, "then asked if my titanium hand vibrated."

"What!?" Her father snapped.

"Lex then proceed to bend his arm 90 degrees in the wrong direction." Robobot explained. "Then punch him in the testicles with his own fist."

"Attagirl," Rex smiled.

"Thanks Dad. Anyway he won't sue us, but hes not gooing to sponsor us either." Lex explained.

"Damn." Rex then saw American Ranger and Portia walk in. "Did you two have any luck?"

"Afraid not." Ranger shook his head. "Turns out a lot of the offices I went to no longer exist and the one that did had become some kind of abomination called a vegan restaurant."

"I reached out to all the contacts I had." Portia said. "But none of them were interested."

"What about Brad and Cooch?" Lex asked. "Did they have any luck with that ad executive?"

"No. I got a call from Brad a few minutes ago." Rex sighed. "The mans dog was brought in and Cooch panicked, clawing up a lot of the office. Brads getting her released from the pound now."

"Why did you send Cooch again?" Robobot asked.

Rex shrugged, "the guy loves animals."

"I'm sorry I can't help more Rex, but I don't have that kind of money to support this team." Portia said.

"No need to apologise Portia." Ranger raised his hand. "After all you have a child to take care of."

"What?" Portia blinked. "I don't have a kid."

"Hey Portia!" Courtney ran in. "I just saw this totally sweet segway online with flames and lightning bolts painted on it. Can have $400?"

"You were saying?" Ranger asked bluntly.

"Hey Rex!" Black Saturn walked in holding a cell phone. "I've been on hold for the past three hours! Is this Hans Lichtenstein that important?"

Portia raised an eyebrow, "who?"

"Hans Lichtenstein is an extremely wealthy industrialist from Germany." Rex explained before placing a hand on Saturn's shoulder. "Who loves superheroes and happens to be a big Black Saturn fan."

"Your right Rex," Saturn smiled. "I got this!" With that he walked away. "Yes, I'll hold."

"Wait up bro!" Courtney went after him. "I wanna show you this sweet segway."

"Germans Rex!" Ranger snapped. "Are we THAT desperate?"

"Ranger, there is no Hans Lichtenstein." Rex said.

"Its just a trick to distract Saturn so he wouldn't call any actual people and totally f*** up any chance we have of getting funding." Lex explained.

"Then who is he actually calling?" Portia asked.

"An automated program that plays classical music and repeats the same three phrases every twenty minutes." Robobot explained.

"So whats the plan now?" Ranger asked.

"Now, your all shit out of luck." Sgt Agony entered the kitchen.

"Agony!" Rex snapped. "You know we have a God damn doorbell!"

"I know. Its broken" Agony said blankly. "But more importantly, I wanted to introduce my new boss." A woman in her fifties walked in. "Madison Shepard. The new head of Financial Approval For Government Spending."

Ranger narrowed his eyes. "That sounds made up."

"Ms Shepard, meet Titanium Rex, founder and leader of the League of Freedom." Agony began introductions. "Rex, meet the woman who holds the future of your team in the palm of her hand."

"Nice to meet you." Rex shook her hand.

"We've actually met before." She smiled.

"We have?" Rex asked.

"Yes, about thirty years ago." Her smile turned into a frown. "When you said you'd call me."

"Uh oh," Rex gulped.

"Well, we're boned." Robobot said.

"Oh don't worry," she assured him. "Sure at first I wanted to take a flaming chainsaw to that potato dick of yours. But I've moved on from that."

"This does not bode well." Portia said.

"Anyway, I've bin reviewing the performance of the League of Freedom for the past few years." Madison narrowed her eyes at Rex. "And I have come to a final decision about your funding." The entire team braced themselves while Agony smirked. "The Leagues funding," she suddenly smiled, "will be doubled."

"What!?" The League gasped.

"WHAT!?" Agony gasped even louder.

"The League may be a group of mismatched misfits, with a couple of jackasses thrown in there. But I truly believe that when the world needs them, the League has always stood up and saved us." Madison explained. "For that reason I am doubling you funding."

The heroes began cheering and hugging each other. "Thank you!" Rex couldn't be happier. "Madison I could kiss you!"

"Buy me a drink first." She winked, but then said. "Seriously, I want that dinner you promised me."

"I can do that." Rex nodded.

"You can't be serious!" Agony exclaimed. "I thought you were gonna cut off their funding, not give them more."

"Shut it Agony!" Ms Shepard snapped before addressing the heroes. "There is a condition. You need to expand."

Rex raised an eyebrow. "Expand?"

"This is a god damn mansion!" Madison threw her arms out. "There are only eight of you living here. Nine if you count that idiot man child Ms Jones is dating." She looked to Portia, "Big fan by the way, love your show."

"Thank you." Portia smiled.

"You have to increase the League of Freedoms roster and recruit new members." Madison clarified. "Do this and you'll get the extra funding." She handed Rex a card. "Heres my number and you better call this time or I will break out the flaming chainsaw."

"Got it." Rex nodded.

"Then I'll leave you to it." Madison headed for the door. "Maybe try and get an alien on the team. That would be something." With that she left, a furious Sgt Agony following.

"Wow," Lex smiled. "I don't think that could have gone any better."

"Especially considering genitals were threatened wit h a flaming chainsaw." Robobot added.

"We're back," Cooch and Brad walked in, the former drinking from a large cup. "We stopped for shlushies."

"Agony looked pissed." Brad observed. "What did we miss."

"Our funding has been doubled!" Ranger announced.

"Awesome!" The cat cheered. "Lets buy dune buggies!"

"We're not getting dune buggies." Rex snapped.

"Hey Rex!" Saturn ran in. "I got through to Lichtenstein!"

"How is that possible?" Lex whispered to Robobot.

"I have no idea." He shook his head.

"This is your lucky day, cause this is Black Saturn calling. Yes I'm over eighteen." Saturn smirked while giving everyone a thumbs up. "You kidding? I wear leather everyday. Do I use toys? All the time." Everyone else's eyes widened. "Is there such a thing as too big?" Rex grabbed the phone and crushed it. "What the hell Rex!?"

"We don't need Lichtenstein anymore Saturn." The Subtopian told him. "Our funding has been doubled."

"Provided we recruit more members." Robobot added.

"We just need to get the word out." Portia put her hands on her hips, "and I know just how to do it." Suddenly there was a knock at the door.

"Does anyone find it strange that we all came to the door?" Robobot asked as the entire team had come.

Rex opened the door to see a familiar face. "Ivan Whiff?"

"Hello Rex," Ivan smiled, but raised an eyebrow when he saw the entire League, "and everyone else."

"What are you doing here?" Ranger asked.

"Look we talked about this," Saturn spoke up, "Its cool you want me for your team but-"

"NO!" Ivan shouted. "I don't want to recruit you! I have never wanted you to join me! Get that through your f***ing skull!"

"Oh," Saturn blinked before crossing his arms. "Doesn't matter, I got the League of Freedom. Right guys?" No one answered, "guys?"

"I'm here because a little birdie told me League of Freedom was losing funding." Ivan smirked.

"Let me guess, a little bird named Agony?" Lex spoke up. "Its cute you guys still hang out after your plan to tick me into joining your team so he could get the League shut down failed."

"Ah yes, a poor decision on my part." Whiff chuckled. "But I'm here to make amends. I am willing sponsor the League."

"Is that right?" Rex asked sceptically.

"As the head of Whiff Incorporated, I am a billionaire." Ivan smirked. "Of course, I would expect a sign of gratitude for all my help."

"Let me guess," Portia put her hands on her hips, "joining the League.

"Naturally." Whiff nodded, "I think, second in command would suffice. After all with all the money-"

"Too late." Rex cut him off.

Whiff blinked, "what?"

"Our budgets been doubled." The subtopian grinned. "Our funding troubles are officially over."

"I, are you serious!?" Ivan spluttered.

"Yeah," Lex nodded, "happened like five minutes ago."

Whiff was in shock. "But I, I got here early and was knew Sgt Agony coming. Are you saying I just missed my window!?"

"Probably." Cooch shrugged. "See ya." With that she slammed the door in his face.

"GAH! MY NOSE!" Whiff could be heard yelling.

"Well, that was satisfying." Rex smiled. "Portia, you said you had an idea?"

The next day on A Talk in the Clouds

"Before we finish the show today, I have big news." Portia began. " Isn't that right Rex?" She gestured upwards as Rex flew down onto the stage.

"That's right Portia." Rex smiled before looking out at the crowd. "Hello everyone. For more than seven decades, the League of Freedom has been protecting this country and the world from anyone or anything that wished us harm. But in these times of super villains, alien invasions and evil robots-"

"We're not all evil." Robobot called out from off stage.

Rex rolled his eyes and continued. "The point is that when the threats grow stronger, so must the forces that face them. That is why the League of Freedom will be recruiting new members."

"Whether your from another planet, got powers from a lab accident or discovered a magic artifact," Portia tapped the jewel around her neck.

"If you have the courage and dedication to fight for justice, then the League Of Freedom wants you!" Rex pointed at the camera with his titanium hand.

"Just download the application form the website at the bottom of the screen," a website address appeared, "it'll help you create a resume that you can send directly to the Mansion where it will be examined by League members." Portia explained.

"We'll contact you with a time and a date for you to come in and try out. If we feel you've got the right stuff, then your in." Rex said. Portia nudged him. "Oh right. I'm legally required to say that among the refreshments served, there will be a gluten free option for anyone who is celiac. If you are not celiac but are still avoiding gluten, then there is another option. Grow the f*** up!"

"And that all the time we have." Portia cut in. "See you next week everybody." She waved as the music played them out. "Did you have to insult people like that?" Portia asked.

"Someone had to." Rex replied.

Portia placed her hands on her hips. "You know that's gonna cost you some potential members right?"

"Portia, they could control time, but if they whined about gluten for no reason, its not worth it." Rex said.

 **The following chapters will each have a different hero audition for the League of Freedom. I am excluding characters from DC and Marvel. This story is set in AU to the show so that I can use certain characters. But once again I highly recommend watching all three seasons of Supermansion.**


	2. Maui (Moana)

**Welcome everyone to the very firt Hero audition. If you haven't seen Moana yet, major spoilers ahead.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Supermansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.**

 **Supermansion Unlimited**

Outside the Supermansion, the League of Freedom sat at a table prepared to meet new heroes and potential members. In the middle was Titanium Rex, at his side was Robobot, American Ranger, Black Saturn, and Brad. On the other was Portia Jones, Cooch and Titanium Lex.

"Alright, Maui," Rex read the resume, "shape shifter, Demigod of the wind of sea-"

"Hero of Men," Maui cut in, resting his hook on his shoulder.

"What?" Rex asked.

"Its actually Maui, shape shifter, Demigod of the wind of sea, Hero of Men." Maui explained. "I interrupted, from the top, Hero of Men. Go."

Rex blinked, "ok, well-"

"Sorry, sorry, sorry, and women," he cut in again, looking to Portia, Cooch and Lex. "Men and women, both, all. Not a guy girl thing," he shrugged. "Maui is a hero to all."

"Moving on!" Rex said before he could bring up more titles.

"Tell us about yourself." Portia said.

"Well not to brag but I am the greatest Demigod in all the Pacific North Islands." He boasted. "I've bin battling monsters and helping humanity for centuries."

"It says here your powers include Godly Strength." Lex read the resume. "Exactly how strong is that?"

"Well," Maui leaned on his hook flexed his arm, "I've dragged whole islands up from the bottom of the sea, lassoed the sun to slow it down and even held up the sky itself."

"Damn dude, you serious?" Cooch asked.

"Very," Maui smirked.

"There is no way of calculating the second two, mainly because they are impossible as it's the Earth that rotates around the sun and touching the sky is figurative only." Robobot said. "But to pull even a small island from the sea floor would require beyond extreme levels of physical strength."

"Impressive," Rex smiled.

"And my strength isn't limited to my muscles," Maui added. "Its also in my lungs."

"So you can hold your breath for a long time?" Brad asked.

"I could," the Demigod shrugged. "But I'd rather do this." He inhaled and released a massive gust of wind. The League members had to hold their tables down so they wouldn't be blown away.

"My God!" Ranger said as the wind finally stopped.

"GAK!" They looked to see Saturn had been covered in dust and spitting rapidly. "Its in my mouth!"

"I can see that being very useful against a gas attack." Robobot said.

"You mean like a really bad fart after too many burritos?" Cooch asked.

"Sure, ptooey!" Saturn spit again. "But lets get to the real questions," he leaned forward. "Do you have a catchphrase?"

Maui raised an eyebrow, "huh?"

"You know, words that strike fear into criminals," he explained. "Like; You mess with the Saturns town, you get the rings!" He pulled out two Saturn Rings and Rex pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance.

"Oh I get it," Maui realised. "Yeah, I got one of those." He raised his hook above his head, "ITS MAUI TIME!"

Saturn rolled his eyes but before he could remark, "I like it." Brad said.

"Me two." Rex nodded. "Short and sweet."

"I got a question," Cooch spoke up and pointed at the hook. "What is that thing?"

"This, is my magic fish hook." He held it up for them to see. "Created by the Gods themselves."

"Um excuse," Ranger cut in, "I think you mean God, singular."

"What?" Maui asked.

"Well there is only one true-" he was then cut off.

"RANGER!" Rex snapped. "Not now! Please continue Maui."

"In addition to being a mighty weapon for battle, it also lets me do this!" With that he swung the hook around and within a blue light, he transformed into a giant hawk and took to the sky.

"Whoa." Lex said with wide eyes.

The heroes watched in awe as he flew around with great speed before flying down towards them. "PULL UP! PULL UP!" Ranger shouted. Another blue light and he became a small insect and flew around them. Then he turned into an iguana, jumped off the table and ran across the ground back to where he started and returned to normal.

"That was Awesome!" Cooch said.

"So that's what you meant by shape shifter." Portia observed.

"And even without shape shifting, my fish hook is perfect weapon for battle." The Demigod smiled.

"Okay, I gotta stop you right there." Saturn stood up and walked forward.

"Saturn!" Rex whispered angrily. "What are you doing?"

"Don't get me wrong big guy, that trick was pretty cool. But no way that thing can be used in an actual fight." Saturn pointed at the hook. "To be truly effective, a weapons gotta be compact and deadly, like these!" He took out two Saturn Rings, "observe." With that he threw them both and the bounced off a statue and a wall before heading for Maui, who looked bored. He swung his hook, which glowed blue and sliced both rings in half.

Black Saturns eyes widened in shock and he looked at Maui who smirked as his hook stopped glowing. "Its actually very effective, like this." He swung the hook and tripped Saturn, making him fall on his face. Maui then used the hook to catch the rings on his mask, then lifted him off the ground and swung him around over his head before dropping him on the ground hard. "Like I said, very effective."

"I'm convinced," Ranger smiled. "You handle that hook well solider."

"Thanks," the demigod looked at his hook. "Feel just like the original."

"What do you mean?" Lex asked.

"Well, this isn't the fish hook I started with and used to perform all those legendary feats with." Maui began. "My original hook was destroyed when I fought Te Ka, a being of Earth and fire. It wasn't easy, but I had to buy time for my friend to return the Heart of Te Fiti."

"That sounds like one hell of a story." Portia said

"I'll tell you the whole thing some time." Maui smiled. "Its got a real twist at the end."

"I am curious," Robobot spoke up. "What happens to the hook when you shape shift?"

"Oh it becomes at tattoo," Maui said before becoming a giant hawk again. "See," he lifted his wing to reveal an image of the hook on his feathers. "Which is handy," he returned to normal, "cause it would be really awkward to carry while I'm transformed."

"Hold on." Ranger looked at the resume. "It says here that your immortal." That caught the others attention. "What do you mean by that?"

"Immortality is defined as; Eternal life, existence unending and being exempt from death." Robobot explained.

"That word get thrown around a lot." Maui returned to normal and shrugged. "In my case, it means I don't age."

"Must be nice." Rex said under his breath.

"I once survived 1,000 years stranded with no food or fresh water." Maui went on. "But I do like to eat and sleep. Now while I can survive things that normal humans couldn't, I can still be killed."

Rex narrowed his eyes and leaned forward. "Ah I am having a stoke, or is one of your tattoos laughing at Black Saturn?" Rex pointed.

"Oh no, no, no," Maui waved it off with a laugh. "This is Mini Maui," he gestured to the sentient tattoo. "Say hello," and he waved at them.

"Hi," Cooch waved back.

"Okay, that's a new one." Robobot said.

"You see my tattoos are magical, they appear when I earn them." Maui explained, turning around to show the different tattoos. "Fighting giant monsters, harnessing the breeze, giving humanity fire, coconuts, that sort of thing."

"So each tattoo is kind of like a badge of honor," Portia reasoned.

Maui thought for a moment. "Yeah, that sounds about right."

"Looks like you got badges everywhere." Cooch looked at them all, then pointed downwards. "Do you have ones on your butt? Oh what about your-"

"Cooch!" Rex cut her off. "We don't need to know that. Ahem, I've gotta say Maui, I am impressed." The Subtopian said. "You got the powers, experience and the desire to help humanity."

"Agreed," Portia spoke up, "But I have a personal question, why? Why did you do everything you've done for humanity?"

Maui was visibly shaken by the question. "Oh ah, well you know, its just. Humans need a lot of saving. You know?" He chuckled. "This guy," he pointed at Robobot. "This guy gets it."

"They do seem incapable of taking care of themselves." The robot said.

"I realise this is a tough question for you and if you don't feel comfortable telling us that's fine. But we want you to know that the League of Freedom is a team that comes together and helps carry each others baggage. Be it mistakes you've made, or who you used to be. The League is here to help."

"Wow Portia," Lex blinked, "that was beautiful."

"Okay," Maui took a deep breath. "I wasn't born a demigod, I was born human with human parents." The turned around and pull his hair aside to show his first tattoo, "who didn't want me and threw me into the ocean. The Gods found me, gave me my hook and made me Maui. Ever since then, I've been helping humans however I can."

"Instead of wanting revenge, you wanted love." Portia smiled.

"You have a good heart Maui." Rex smiled. "Your exactly the kind of hero this team needs." This made Maui smile brightly. "But there is one thing," he added. "Would you be willing to put on some pants? Or at the very least shorts?" Maui blinked before looking down at his leaf skirt. "Its just Superheroes are constantly under the public eye and it wouldn't help if they saw, well-"

"Your junk." Cooch blurted out.

Rex glared at her, "thank you Cooch.

Maui thought for a moment. "Could I wear the shorts under my leaf skirt?"

"Sure," Rex shrugged.

"Then I'm good." The Demigod smiled.

"Maui," Rex stood up. "Welcome to the League of Freedom!"

Maui jumped in the air with a yell of joy as the rest of the League of Freedom clapped. Which seemed to wake up Black Saturn. "Argh, what I miss?"

 **(HERO APPROVED)**

 **And theres the first chapter, I hope you all liked it. Not everyone who auditions will get in, it'll be pretty obvious why.**


	3. Star & Marco(Star Vs The Forces of Evil)

**Disclaimer: I do not own Supermansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.**

 **Supermansion Unlimited**

"So, who are we interviewing this time?" Ranger asked.

"Princess Star Butterfly." Rex read the resume.

"A princess you say?" Black Saturn smiled.

"She is fifteen years old." Robobot spoke up.

"Never mind!" Saturn said quickly.

"Fifteen?" Portia blinked. "Isn't she a little young for this?"

"I thought the same thing at first," Rex admitted. "But if shes really serious about being a hero, then its our responsibility to help her become the best hero she can be."

"And I suppose being a princess implying that she is very rich would have nothing to do with letting her join?" Robobot asked.

"Dad, letting someone join for money is a bad idea." Lex spoke up. "Did you learn nothing from hiring Black Saturn?"

"Thanks Lex." Saturn smiled, not grasping that it was an insult.

"I rest my case." Lex said bluntly.

"Everyone take it easy!" Rex stood up. "I'm not just gonna let her join. Shes gonna get the same chance to prove herself just like everyone else does." He sat down and picked up the resume, quietly muttering. "And if she decides to help out with the Leagues budget, all the better."

"I heard that." Lex said. "I have Titan hearing two you know."

"Assuming this princess actually shows up." Ranger pointed out.

Suddenly a portal opened in front of them.

"What the hell is that?" Rex asked.

Robobot scanned it. "It appears to be some kind of portal."

Star jumped out of the portal and smiled brightly. "Hi everybody!"

"Princess Butterfly I presume?" Portia asked.

Marco stepped through the portal before it closed. "Sorry we're late."

"Who are you?" Cooch asked.

"Marco Diaz," he introduced himself.

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "Diaz?" But before he could speak again, Rex cut him off.

"If you mention a green card, I'm pairing you with Saturn for every mission." The Subtopion warned making Ranger gulp. "We've been expecting you as well Marco. Though your resume wasn't easy to read."

"What?" Marco's eyes widened. "That can't be, I filled it out with all relevant," he paused and noticed Star looking away whistling. "Star," he narrowed his eyes, "What did you do?"

"Well," Star faced him but avoided eye contact. "I thought your resume looked a little boring so, I gave it a little flare." She waved her hands at the last part.

"That's one word for it." Rex turned the paper around revealing stickers and colourful drawings. Marco cast another glare at Star who smiled nervously.

"Its okay," Portia decided to change the subject. "Tell us about yourselves?"

"I'm a magical Princess, from another dimension!" Star smiled, creating a rainbow above her, which then caught on fire.

"I never thought I'd say this, but your rainbows on fire." Lex said.

"Don't worry about it." Marco assured them.

Saturn took a picture with his phone. "This would make a killer album cover!"

"I'm from the Kingdom of Mewni." Star began. "When I turned fourteen, my Mom Queen Moon passed down to me, the Royal Magic Wand!" She held it up for them to see.

"Cool." Cooch said.

"You ain't seen nothing yet!" Star smiled. "Dagger Crystal Heart Attack!" The wand fired heart shaped daggers that cut into a statue. "Rolling Thunder Lightning Blast!" A blast of thunder and lightning destroyed another statue. "Shooting Star Explosion!" Glowing shooting stars shot at a statue before exploding.

"O.M. God!" Lex said. "That was amazing!"

"Your not mad about the statues?" Marco asked.

"Honestly no," Rex shook his head. "I always thought they were tacky. But more importantly they were insured."

"Yeah, I'm a natural." Star twirled the wand in her hand. "But I may have a little, mishap on my first day." She referred to nearly burning down the kingdom, "So my parents decided to send me to Earth, where I could train safely. I even went to high school where I met Marco."

"They wanted the best candidate to be her guide and teach her about Earth." Marco crossed his arms with a smirk.

"Since then, me and Marco have been best friends!" Star pulled him into a one armed hug. "We've been on so many adventures together, fighting monsters, pixies and all kinds of crazy stuff!"

"Infact, I was recently made Stars squire." Marco said proudly.

"That like a sidekick?" Brad asked.

"What?" Marcos eyes widned. "No, no, no no. Marco Diaz is nobodies sidekick."

"Whats a sidekick?" Star asked.

"Well," Ranger began. "Traditionally a sidekick is a companion, usually a very close friend, who fights by the heroes side. Though not as strong, they offer knowledge or skills the hero doesn't have. Often being the straight man to the heroes funny attitude."

"Marco!" Star gasped. "That's totally what you do!"

"Agh," Marco frowned.

"So Marco," Saturn leaned back in his seat. "What have you got?"

"Well I don't have a magic wand, but I do have these!" He pulled out his dimensional scissors.

"Scissors?" Cooch raised an eyebrow. "We don't need scissors. I can cut through stuff with my claws."

"Sure, but can your claws do this!" With that he cut open a portal and stepped through it.

"Whoa," Brad gasped.

"Fascinating." Robobot scanned. "The portals are literal tares in the fabric between dimensions."

Marco stepped back out. "Ta da!" He said as the portal closed. "I just popped back to Echo Creek and picked up a couple of burritos." He held them up.

Stars eyes widened. "GIMMIE!" She pounced, grabbing a burrito and proceeded to devour it.

Marco noticed everyone staring. "Heh, she really loves burritos."

"We can see that." Robobot said.

"Anyway, with these I can open a portal to other dimensions." Marco explained.

"What the hell man?" Saturn spoke up. "You couldn't have grabbed us some burritos?" Marco just raised an eyebrow at him.

"That's enough Saturn!" Rex snapped. "Now then Marco, why don't you tell us," he stopped when he noticed Cooch swiping at thin air. "Cooch, what are you doing?"

"Trying to cut open one of those portal things." She replied. "I want quesadillas."

"Cooch, your claws aren't magic and can't open portals." Lex pointed out.

"You don't know that." The cat shot back.

"Actually I do." Lex said bluntly. "Stop swiping and sit down." Cooch complied while grumbling under her breath.

Marco raised an eyebrow at this but didn't comment. He was about to take a bite of his burrito, but discovered over half of it was gone. "What happened to my burrito?"

"Its a mystery." Star shrugged with her mouth full and Marco narrowed his eyes at her.

"Where did you get the scissors?" Rex asked.

Marco held them up. "I earned these scissors by proving myself to Hekapoo, the forger of all Dimensional scissors."

"Heka what?" Portia asked.

"Member of the Magic Council," Marco said simply. "And let me tell ya, it was not easy. Took me sixteen years."

"Sixteen years!" They gasped.

"Before you ask, time works differently in her dimension. For everyone else, I'd only been gone a few minutes and when I came back home, I was the same age I was when I left." Marco explained. "Which was kinda a bummer since I looked awesome!"

"Yeah," Star said with a dreamy look on her face. "Abs," she thought making herself blush while Marco raised an eyebrow at her.

"Unbelievable." Rex shook his head. "Just poof and hes young again."

"Just like magic." Robobot quipped earning a glare from Rex.

"What were you doing there in the first place?" Portia asked.

"Helping a friend." He looked to Star and smiled, "and I wasn't leaving until I did." Star smiled back.

"Rainbows and portals, huh?" Black Saturn stood up and walked in front of them. "Tell me this, how useful are those in combat?" He drew a Saturn ring. "Show me what you got!"

"Oh God not again," Rex face palmed.

"Okay," Star smiled before raising her wand. "Rainbow Fist Punch!" A bright rainbow with a clenched fist at the front fired from the wand, punching Saturn in the face and knocking him to the ground.

"That's one powerful rainbow." Ranger blinked, then added. "Never thought I hear myself say that."

"Okay," Saturn got up and shook his head clear. "Not bad, can you handle this!" He threw the Saturn Ring at them.

Marco cut open a portal a and the ring flew into it. "Portals aren't just for transportation." He crossed his arms smugly. "They can be used defensively and offensively." A tactical reached out of the portal, wrapping around Saturn and lifted him off the ground before electrocuting him. It dropped him before retreating into the portal as it closed.

"I have gotta say, you two have some impressive powers." Rex smiled.

"Do more magic!" Cooch clapped.

"Sure!" Star smiled brightly. "Glowworm Blast." The wand shot blue glowworms, one hit the ground near Saturn and exploded.

"Holy crap!" He jumped to his feet and ran away from the incoming exploding worms.

"Narwhal Blast!"

"Whats a narwhal?" Brad asked.

The wand fired several narwhals at Saturn who had to duck, jump and roll to avoid them.

"Apparently those are narwhals." Rex pointed out.

"For my finale!" Star spun around. "Warnicorn Stampede!" The creatures appeared and ran towards Saturn who screamed before using his grappling hook to pull himself into a tree as the Warnicorns ran past.

"HA! Black Saturn smirked. "Suck it you stupid unicorns!" The warnicorns stopped and turned their heads, narrowing their eyes at him. "Uh oh," he lost his smirk when the warnicorns pushed the tree over and proceeded to trample him.

"My God!" Ranger gasped. "Those unicorns are incredible!" Then added, "never thought I'd hear myself say that either."

"Actually those are Warnicorns." Marco pointed out. "Theses a difference, trust me."

"Okay Princess, your packing some serious firepower." Ranger admitted. "But say you need to catch someone without blowing them up or trampling them. Any spells for that."

"Sure I got lots of those." Star smile never faltered. "Watch. Jellybean Hallucination Mist." A light blue mist sprayed Ranger.

"What the," his irises grew as he saw jellybeans floating around him, "hell?" When it wore off Ranger shook his head. "My God! What was that?"

"Remember when you asked me what the 60's was like?" Rex asked. "I think what you just experienced pretty much summed it up."

"Aw man I missed it." Brad groaned.

"Yoink!" Suddenly Saturn grabbed the wand and scissors out of their hands and held them about his head.

"Hey!" Star and Marco said in unison.

"Found your weaknesses," he smirked. "Without your magic toys, you two are just helpless kids."

Their eyes widend, "did he just call us helpless kids?" Star asked.

"I think he did." Marco said. They both looked at each other and smiled. "After you Princess."

"Thank you squire." Star said before facing Saturn and punching him in the gut.

"OW!" Before he could react, Marco Karate chopped him in the neck, making him drop their stuff.

The two of them moved in sync punching and kicking Saturn many times before Star jump kicked him in the face, knocking him out cold. The rest of the League sat there watching in silence except for Lex who recorded the whole thing on her phone. "O. M. God! That was amazing!"

"Sixteen years in that dimension gave me a lot of combat practice. Course before that I was already a red belt." Marco said proudly as he picked up his scissors.

"Nobody calls me a helpless child." Star said in a low voice while retrieving her wand and perked up again. "I am Star Butterfly! Strong, independent woman with fists like hammers."

"No kidding." Cooch said. "How many monsters you fought anyway."

"Tons." Star smiled, but then her smile fell a bit. "Things were different then."

Portia raised an eyebrow. "Different how?"

"Well," she held her wand with both hands, "a long time ago Mewni actually belonged to the monsters. Then Mewman settlers arrived after a lot of fighting they took over and built the kingdom. Since then the monsters have been treated like they were all bad, and yeah there are bad monsters but there are good monsters two. But they were all still feared and treated badly."

"So your people just stole their land?" Ranger was shocked. "That's horrible, having their native land stolen by invaders and treated like they were the ones in the wrong," He then noticed the rest of the League giving him looks. "What? Did I miss something?"

"Your kidding right?" Robobot asked.

"I'm not proud of it, but I used to think the same." Star admitted. "But when I finally realised not all monsters were bad, I tried to get everyone else to see that to. I even got my friend Buff Frog who is a monster, a job as Head of Monster Mewman Relations."

"Head of relations?" Cooch asked. "You mean like he taught them how to bone?"

Star raised an eyebrow, "huh?"

"Nothing!" Rex cut in, "Cooch be quite. Please continue Star."

"But it didn't work." Star said sadly. "All the monsters decided to leave Mewni and find a new home."

"Star you shouldn't blame yourself." Portia said. "Changing the world isn't easy and changing minds is even harder.

"You don't just protect the world Star," Rex smiled. "You try and make it better for everyone in it. That's exactly the kind of attitude the League needs."

"Really?" Eyes widened with excitement. "But," she wrapped an arm around Marco. "Me and Marco are a package lunch."

"Its package deal, Star." Marco corrected.

"That two." She shrugged.

"That's good." Rex said. "Because we want you both."

Marcos eyes widened. "Really?"

"You know what your story says to me Marco?" Rex asked.

"A possible child abduction case?" Robobot offered.

"Dedication and the will power to always stand by a friend." The Subtopian smiled.

"Something to think about, eh Rex." Ranger glared at him.

"Yeah," Rex coughed nervously. "The point is, I look at you two and see a future generation of heroes. Princess Star Butterfly, Marco Diaz, Welcome to the League of Freedom!"

Both teens eyes widened before looking at each other. "WE DID IT!" The hugged each other. Star broke away and raised her wand. "This calls for laser puppies!"

"Wait," Cooch blinked, "laser what?"

Star fired a pink light at the ground and a litter small beige puppies appeared. "Aww," all but one of the League said.

"Dogs!" Cooch jumped out of her seat. "No way man! Now way!"

"Cooch calm down!" Portia snapped. "They're small harmless pup-" she was cut off as a red beam flew by her face. "What the?" She turned to see the puppies were all shooting lasers from their eyes.

"That's a new one." Robobot observed.

"Argh," Saturn groaned as her woke up. "What happened?" He was a puppy sitting in front of him. "Aw," it then fired a laser into his eye. "OW! What the f***!" The other puppies heard him and ran towards him, shooting lasers as they went. "Oh shit!" Saturn jumped to his feet and ran with the laser puppies chasing him. "Ow!" He cried as lasers hit him from behind. "Little help! OW!"

"Still adorable." Lex smiled as she recorded the scene with her phone.

 **(HERO APPROVED)**

 **I know we all have different expectations. But I hope everyones excited for Season 4.**


	4. Captain Hero (Drawn Together)

**Brace yourselves folks, this try outs gonna be very different to the first two. Spoiler alert for anyone who never saw Drawn Together.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Supermansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.**

 **Supermansion Unlimited**

"Captain Hero," Rex read the resume.

"The one and only," Hero stood proudly.

"Tell us a little about yourself." Portia said.

"Well I'm originally from the planet Zebulon," he began. "But I was sent to Earth as a baby when the planet fell into the sun."

"Dear God!" Saturn gasped, but then smiled. "Now that's a tragic back story."

"You're an alien!?" Ranger narrowed his eyes. "Do you have a green card?"

"Really Ranger?" Rex snapped. "He just said his planet was destroyed and that's the first place your mind goes?"

"Now I protect the Earth." Hero continued. "If evil strikes and innocent people are in danger, then this looks like a job for Captain Hero!" With that he tore off his costume, revealing an identical costume underneath.

"Ah, what was that?" Robobot asked.

"Oh I always wear my costume under my clothes." Hero explained.

"Even when your already wearing your costume?" Portia asked.

Hero just smiled. "Yep."

"Okay then. What kind of powers do you have?" Lex asked.

"Well I could tell you, but how about I show you!" Hero dashed over to a statue, "Super speed." He grabbed the statue and lifted it with one hand above his head, "super strength." He snapped it in half before throwing the pieces into the air and flew up after them. "Flight and laser vision!" He blasted the stone pieces causing them to explode.

He landed and the league gave a small applause. "Very impressive," Rex observed.

"It also says you have a Hero Shield?" Lex asked.

"What? Oh that. I ah, lost that power, must have wrote it down my mistake." Hero said quickly as his eyes darted back and forth.

Suddenly a crash was heard. Everyone turned to see a large piece of the blasted statue had landed on Black Saturn's car, breaking the windshield and burning the upholstery. "MY CAR!" Saturn screamed and ran over to put out the fire.

"Whoops, sorry." Hero apologised.

"Don't worry about it." Rex waved it off. "Now this says you've been a superhero for many years and faced a lot of villains."

"Oh I've fought my share of supervillains all right." Hero started counting them off. "The Gigantic Midget, the Evil Mad Libber and his sidekick the Mighty QuadrapilJack, and the most confused villain of all Senior Eskimo Goldberg."

"Worst names ever," Brad said

"Look, I think we can all agree that I'm League material." Hero smiled.

"That's for us to decide." Black Saturn returned and crossed his arms.

"Okay, I see what your concerned about. But let me assure you I love gay people. I actually have a gay roommate and I'm sure you and I will get along just as well." Hero pointed at Black Saturn.

"What!?" Saturn stood up gasping. "I'm not gay! I like chicks!"

"Didn't you bang the Groaner last Halloween." Cooch asked.

"What!? Who told you that?" He demanded.

"I told her." Brad said.

"How did you know?" Saturn asked.

"I read it on your twitter page," he answered.

"You must have posted it in one of your drunken hissing fits." Robobot explained.

"Oh God!" Saturn started crying.

"Black Saturn crying." American Ranger deadpanned. "What a shock."

"The Groaner you say?" Captain Hero placed a hand under his chin. "Tell me, is he affiliated with the Moaner?"

"Lets move on shall we?" Rex spoke up, hoping to get back on track.

"Hey just double checking, if I join I get to move into the Mansion right?" Hero asked.

"That's correct." Ranger nodded.

"Fair warning, living this odd bunch will take some getting use to." Portia said.

"Can't be much different than the house I live in now." Hero shrugged. "I live with an overly religious princess, a hot black mystery solving musician, a whale, a totally gay video game adventurer, an internet pig, an Asian battle monster and a wacky what ever the f*** he is."

No one was quite sure what to say to any of that. "Okay," Rex tried to get the ball rolling again. "Now according to your resume you created the -"

"HOLY F***ING SHIT!" Robobot said suddenly.

"Whats the matter?" Lex asked. "Is Storm City under attack?"

"No," the robot stood up. "I will be right back." With that he ran back inside the mansion.

"That was Weird." Cooch said.

"Hey if your into weird and freaky, then I'm your guy." Hero winked at her.

"Sorry to break it to you solider but Cooch here us actually a cat." Ranger explained.

"A hyper evolved cat." Cooch clarified.

"Debateable." Ranger said.

"Also taken," Brad narrowed his eyes.

"That's no problem," Hero waved it off. "I don't care about race or species. Especially in the bedroom."

"Gross." Rex winched.

"Oh like you can judge," the cat shot back.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" The Subtopion asked.

"You did have sex with Frau Mantis." Portia pointed out. "A bug. No offence Lex."

"Little offended." She replied.

"Not the mention my wife for over half a century!" Ranger snapped.

"And my Mom!" Black Saturn added.

"Mine two!" Ranger added.

"Oh," Rex sunk down in his seat a bit.

"Dude," Hero smiled. "Two Moms, a bug and an old lady? That's gotta be some kind of a record. Up top," he raised his hand.

"Don't touch that hand!" Robobot returned with papers in his hands.

"Whats wrong?" Rex asked.

"I ran a background check on Captain Leslie Hero," the robot said.

"Leslie?" Brad snickered.

"First of all, most of the villains he fights are all mentally challenged individuals who most heroes don't feel comfortable fighting. Others aren't villains at all." Robobot handed out the papers, "what else I found will shock you."

"Destruction of a supermarket?" Portia read.

"Not so super after all," Hero smirked.

Saturn had stopped crying, "rampaging through a restaurant?"

"Super Salad may have escaped me that time, and the three other times I went there, but next time I will find him!" He said dramatically.

"Betting on your own fights and then throwing them?" Brad read.

"I know what your thinking and yes, the answer is a crap load of money." Hero said.

"You killed Supernanny?" Ranger read. "Oh wait, she was invading the White House, never mind."

"Theft, assault, kidnapping, murder," Rex read then gasped. "Multiple counts of gross abuse of a corpse?"

"Gross is a little harsh," Hero shrugged.

"Ah guys, I just looked up the destruction of planet Zebulon." Lex spoke up while looking at her phone. "It says Zebulon was destroyed just a few years ago. Plus, witnesses says someone literally threw it into a sun."

"I am NOT the lamest superhero ever!" Hero snapped. "Oh, sorry about that. Yeah turns out Zebulon wasn't destroyed like I thought it was. Who knew?"

"Anyone with internet access apparently." Ranger pointed out.

"Warning! I am detecting increased radiation levels." Robobot spoke up. "They are similar to the radiation from X-rays."

"X-rays?" Portia raised an eyebrow. "Where could that be-" she then noticed Hero staring at her and it clicked. "Son of a bitch!" She covered her chest with her arms.

"Oh sorry, force of habit." Hero chuckled.

"You think that's funny? I should call Zenith down here and kick you ass!" Portia threatened.

"Buy me a drink first and we'll see what happens," he winked at her.

Saturn stood up and marched over to Hero. "Wipe that God damn smile off your face! Before I wipe you myself." Saturn then realised what he said. "I mean, I'll kick your ass."

"Calm down Saturn." Robobot said. "I'm sure your insurance will pay for the damages to your car."

"Uh," Saturn looked away.

"You do have insurance don't you?" The robot asked.

"Oh right!" Hero suddenly remembered something. "I do have one other power." He pointed his fist and Black Saturn and pushed a button on his wrist and an energy blast fired which blasted Saturn across the lawn. "Pretty cool right?"

"Oh God it hurts!" Saturn cried out.

"So," Captain Hero was full of excitement, "am I in?"

"Are you out of your f***ing mind?!" Rex snapped. "Your worse than most of the super villains we've fought!"

"Wait," Hero lost his smile. "Are you saying you, don't want me to join the League?"

"Was that too subtle for you?" Robobot asked. "Allow me to be more direct. F*** NO!"

Captain Hero teared up. "Fine!" His voice became high pitched. "I didn't want to join you assholes anyway!" With that he ran off crying, straight through a stone wall.

"Still sounds less whiney then Saturns crying." Brad observed.

"Definitely," Ranger nodded.

"Oh yea," Lex agreed.

"Hey!" Saturn said.

"God damn it." Rex sighed.

Captain Hero ran down the street crying while knocking over street lights, parking meters and a bus stop. "Leslie stop!" Hero stopped and looked up to see Rex flying towards him and land. "I can't just let you leave like this."

"You mean, you do want me to join the League of Freedom?" Hero smiled brightly.

"You didn't let me finish." Rex said. "I can't just let you leave like this, because your f***ing lunatic and a criminal who belongs locked up in a prison cell!"

"What you talkin about Rex?" Hero asked. Rex answered by punching him in the face with his titanium fist and sent him flying through the air and smashing into a wall. Hero shook his head clear and flew up as did Rex. "You wanna play it that way? Fine!"

Hero flew at Rex tackling him, but Rex pushed him off before punching him in the face, then the gut and slamming his fist down on Heroes head, knocking him to the ground. Hero ripped a street light out of the ground and swung it at Rex who ducked and fired a small laser from the tip of his index finger which hit Hero in the face. "GAH!" He dropped the street lamp and covered his face with his hands. "Son of a bitch!" Rex moved in kneeing Hero in the gut, flying up and swinging him around before throwing him back to the ground.

"You've got three seconds to give up before I introduce your balls to Mr Foot." Rex threatened as he landed.

"Oh Please," Hero got to his feet. "With my super speed, you'd never get close enough to lay a finger on my balls. Let alone a whole foo-" he was cut off when Rex sped over and kicked him in the groin.

"That's for being so God damn smart!" With that he uppercut Hero back into the air and flew up after him. Captain Hero held his crotch in pain, but raised his head and fired his laser vision. Rex turned sideways and it missed him. "Gonna have to do better than that."

Back at the mansion, Black Saturn was still on the ground. "Hey Saturn, I brought you some ice." Lex held up a bag of ice. Which was then hit by the lasers and melted. "What the?"

"God damn it." He groaned.

Back at the fight, Hero had recovered enough to raise his fists. "Better huh? Well do have another trick up my SLEAVE!" He pressed the button on his wrist, firing and energy blast at Rex who flew above it. "What?"

"I just saw you use that trick five minutes ago." Rex glared at him.

"Oh right." Hero remembered. "The try outs. It doesn't matter!" He flew up until he was a few feet in front of Rex. "I've defeated old people before, and I can do it again!" As he rambled on Rex looked bored and raised his titanium hand which changed into cannon. It glowed bright purple and Heros eyes widened. "Oh shit." With that he screamed as he was blasted out of the sky and slammed into the ground, cracking it and knocking him out cold.

Rex landed and his hand returned to normal. "What an asshole."

 **(HERO DENIED)**

 **Like I said when this story first started. Not everyone who auditions will get it and as you've just seen, its pretty obvious why.**


	5. Eddie riggs (Brutal Legend)

**Spoiler Alert for anyone who hasnt played the awesome game, Brutal Legend. Featuring the voice of Jack Black.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Supermansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.**

 **Supermansion Unlimited**

"Eddie Riggs." Rex looked at him. "Tell us about yourself."

"Well, I've loved heavy metal since I was a kid." Eddie began. "Eventually I became a roadie, the best there is. I can tune any guitar, build any stage. But I got stuck looking after this sorry excuse for a metal band, Kabbage Boy."

"I know that band." Black Saturn spoke up. "They were awesome!"

Eddie stared at him before continuing, "Anyway, I had to save the lead guitarists dumbass and ended up getting crushed scaffolding. Looked like I was dead until some blood poured into this." He placed a hand on his belt buckle, "and it summoned the Fire Beast Ormagoden."

"Orma-what?" Ranger asked.

"An ancient giant monster of flaming molten iron. He killed those jackasses and brought me to a world from the past." He went on. "I woke up on this alter and these creepy guys in robes came at me with swords. I wasn't about to die again, so I grabbed this bad boy." He held up his axe, "the Separator!"

"Cool name," Brad said.

"Yeah, I've cut down a tonne of demons with this thing." Eddie said. "Even comes with some upgrades."

"Upgrades?" Robobt asked.

"Eternal Fire, Chain Lightning, Razors Edge, they're really cool." Eddie smiled. "Just like this baby," he held up his guitar. "It may look like an awesome guitar, and it is, but its got powers."

"Your guitar has powers?" Lex raised an eyebrow. "Like, hypnotising people?"

"What? No that'd be weird." Eddie shook his head. "It does stuff like this!" He strummed on his guitar and bolts of lightning shot down striking the ground. "And this!" He struck the Fire Cord and a jet of fire erupted from the ground. "And for my finale, EARTHSHAKER!" He jumped and hit a cord as he landed, creating a shockwave that knocked back everything around him.

"O.M. GOD." Lex was wide eyed. "That was a incredible!"

"You certainly showed the statues." Robobot said.

"Huh?" Eddie looked around and saw he'd destroyed several statues around him. "Oh, my bad."

"They were insured right?" Rex asked the robot who nodded. "Don't worry about it. So what else can it do?"

"Fly into the air." Eddie said and Rex raised an eyebrow. "It'll be awesome trust me."

Rex shrugged. "Sure, why not?" He flew up and Eddie played a solo. Suddenly Rex was pulled back down. "What the hell?" He saw an anvil chained to his legs.

"The Anvil of Burden." Eddie Smirked. "Brings fliers back down to earth."

"Simple, yet highly effective." Robobot said.

"Come on," Rex tried to break the chains but with no luck. "Gotta admit, it works. Can you," he pointed at the anvil.

"Oh don't worry, it'll disappear in a minute." Eddie assured him. "I also have one called Facemelter."

"Whats it do?" Cooch asked.

Eddie blinked at her. "It ah, melts faces."

"We'll take your word for it." Portia said, not wanting to risk it. "Your pretty good with that guitar Eddie and I don't just mean the powers. You ever consider becoming a musician?"

"Nah," Eddie waved it off. "I'm a roadie. My job is to keep other people safe and to do what they were meant to do."

"I get it." Saturn put his feet up on the table. "Some are meant to work out of sight while people like me are meant for the spot light See that car?" He pointed across the yard to his car, "Sweet huh?"

"I guess, but I've got my own ride." Eddie grabbed his guitar and played a solo. In fire and lightning a vehicle appeared. "Allow me to introduce to you, to the Druid Plow."

"Wow!" Cooch said as they all got up get a closer look, including Rex as the anvil had disappeared.

"Built it myself." Eddie said proudly. "Not only does she handle like a dream, but shes got a ton of awesome features. Compliments of the Guardian of Metal. Nitro boosters for speed, armored frame that can mow down demons and have the blood slide right off, and loaded with weapons. Machine guns, a mine dropper, missile launchers, side burners, heat seeker, subwoofer and my personal favourite, the Bolt Thrower."

"Does it have a taco launcher?" Cooch asked.

"Ah," Eddie raised an eyebrow, "no."

"So much raw metal," Lex rubbed the side of the car. "Its kind of sexy."

"Ah, my car has heated seats." Saturn said but no one was listening.

"Thanks, but I should let you know I have a girlfriend." Eddie got out. "Ophelia. We actually met like five minutes after I woke up there. She was disguised as one of those druid guys. Which actually had me worried I'd bin slaying hot girls the whole time."

"Can we focus on this other world you were brought to?" Portia asked.

"Well Ophelia brought me to Bladehenge, where I met Lars Halford and his sister Lita. There we freed the enslaved people and formed an army, Ironheade! With an e on the end, so people know were not messing around." Eddie clarified. "As I explored this new land I unlocked the secrets of the Titans!"

Brad raised an eyebrow, "Titans?"

"A race of giants who left secrets of their power throughout the land before they ascended into the heavens to become Metal Gods." Eddie explained.

"Metal Gods?" Ranger blinked. "That story is completely ridiculous!"

"Says the man who believes in pregnant virgins." Robobot quipped. "Continue Eddie."

"We stormed general Lionwhytes base, he was a traitor and the asshole, took out his forces and wasted him." Eddie drove his fist into his palm. "Things were looking bright, until emperor Doviculus showed up and killed Lars right in front of us. We had to retreat and go into hiding in the mountains. Then Ophelia was corrupted by the sea of Black Tears."

"War is hell solider." Ranger placed a hand on his shoulder. "Doesn't matter what world your in. But it doesn't matter how many setbacks you face or how dark the day may seem, you only truly loose if you give up."

"Oh we didn't give up." Eddie stated. "We regrouped, got more recruits, got stronger and took the fight to Doviculus'es doorstep!"

"Sounds like it was one hell of a, Cooch!" Rex snapped as the hyper evolved cat was now sitting in the drivers seat. "What are you doing?"

"Cool." She began pressing buttons and the Machine guns started firing, right at Saturn's car.

"MY CAR!" Saturn screamed.

"Uh oh," Cooch tried to shut it off but, switched to the bolt thrower which kept firing at the car.

"STOP!" Saturn ran towards the Druid Plow as Cooch kept pressing buttons, activating the subwoofer that blasted Saturn away.

"Take your fingers off the trigger!" Eddie yelled.

"Oh, okay." Cooch removed her hands the firing stopped.

"Argh," Saturn got to his feet only to gasp at the state of his car. It was full of bullet holes, the windshield and windows were broken and one of the heated seats had caught fire. "You son of a bitch!" Saturn ran at Eddie who kicked him in the chest and knocked him on his back.

"Easy man." Eddie said. "It was an accident, and not even one of mine. You should really get outta there." He advised Cooch.

"Okay," she sighed, but as she got out she accidentally hit another switch and fired the heat seeking missile, which honed in on the fire in Saturns car. It hit with a strong explosion that lit up the whole vehicle. "Whoops."

"MOTHER F*****!" Saturn shouted.

"Well at least you have insurance this time." Lex said. But Saturn looked away. "You didn't get insurance? After what happened to your last car?"

"How was I supposed to know this was gonna happen?" Saturn shot back.

"That's kid of the whole point of insurance Saturn." Robobot pointed out.

"Ah quick question," Eddie raised a finger, "should I be worried about this?" He pointed at Cooch who was sniffing his rear.

"Cooch!" Rex pulled her away. "What did I tell you about sniffing peoples asses?"

"You didn't tell me anything." Cooch said.

"I didn't?" Rex was surprised. "I really should have."

She pointed at Eddie, "he smells funny."

"Hey," Eddie protested. "I showered this morning."

"He kinda smells like Zenith. But like the opposite." Cooch went on. "You know like how peanut butter smells the opposite way eggos do?"

"What?" Rex asked as they all looked at the cat in confusion.

"Whose Zenith?" The roadie asked.

Suddenly Portia's bracelet floated off and her eyes widened. "Oh we in trouble now." The bracelet attached to her wrist and armor appeared and a staff in her hand.

"That would be Zenith." Ranger said.

"Cool." Eddie smiled, but lost that smile when she held her staff right in front of his face. "Hey!"

"Silence." Zenith snapped. "You cannot fool me. No matter your disguise, I recognise your kind."

Rex raised an eyebrow, "something you'd like to tell us Eddie?"

"I was getting to it," Eddie took a step back. "But now works." His eyes turned yellow and his skin turned red. Before anyone could speak they gasped as a pair of large bat wings shot out of Eddies back.

"Okay," Lex blinked in surprise, "didn't see that coming."

"Behold," Zenith pointed with her staff. "The demon before us."

"Back vile demon!" Ranger held up a cross. "Back!"

Eddie stared at him for a moment. "I think your holding it upside down."

Ranger saw he was right, "God Damn It!"

"Everybody just relax and let me explain." Eddie said. "My dad was Rignarock, a great warrior who lead the humans against the Tainted Coil during the rebellion, but they fell to the corruption of the Sea of Black Tears. But he never gave up, even as a slave he got closer to the Emperor, Succoria as she travelled to the future to take back the secrets of the Titans."

"I know that name," Zenith spoke up. "Succoria, the Grand Demon Witch, the White-Winged Death. She was one of the fiercest and most blood thirsty demons to ever walk the mortal world." She pointed at Eddies weapon, "that axe of hers has taken many lives."

"Yeah," Eddie nodded before looking at the Separator. "My Mom did a lot of damage with this thing."

"Wait," Rex raised an yebrow, "Your mother?" Eddie gave him a look and the Subtopians eyes widened as he figured it out, "Oh."

"When Succoria saw the future belonged to humans and not demons, she gave up, lost her fighting spirit. My dad couldn't kill her now so, he took care of her. They became close, one thing led to another which led to, me." Eddie shrugged. "Mom didn't survive the birth, so dad took me out of the cave and raised me himself. After he died I found this buckle, which was supposed to be Succorias way back after her mission."

"That is one heavy back story." Brad said.

"Tell me about it." Eddie nodded. "This is actually her shirt."

"She used wear that?" Saturn said in disbelief. "Man she must have bin a big one," he chuckled, not noticing Eddie glaring at him. "Or just had 'Big Ones' Am I right?" He held his fist out to Ranger who just stared at him. "You know, big-AAAAHHHHHH!" He was cut off when he was struck by three bolts of lightning and fell over.

They all looked to Eddie who had just used his guitar to summon that lightning. "What?"

"Totally justified." Ranger nodded.

"I know what its like to have half your DNA come from a dangerous place." Lex sighed. "But, its doesn't define you. We pick our own path, not our DNA."

"And I think its pretty clear you chose the heroes path." Rex smiled.

"Which reminds me," Eddie grabbed his guitar. "I have a solo that your gonna love. But I need a volunteer."

"I'll do it." Lex shrugged and stood beside him. "Now what?"

"Now, its time to sound the Battle Cry!" Eddie played the solo.

"Whoa!" Lex gasped as she felt a surge of power, her fist, arm bands, boots and the T on her chest glowed brightly.

"Lex are you ok?" Her father asked.

"Ok?" Lex looked at her body. "I feel AWESOME!" She took a fighting stance, "somebody come at me!"

Zenith twirled her staff. "Very well." She flew at Lex and swung it at her, but Lex caught the staff with her titanium hand.

Zeniths eyes widened in shock while Lex smirked. "My turn." She kicked Zenith back. The Goddess tried to strike her but Lex blocked each attack and countered with her own. Lex knocked the staff out of Zeniths hand and pulled back her titanium fist and punched Zenith so hard she skid backwards all the way to the tables.

"That was the Battle Cry, it boosts the power of my buddies for a short time." Eddie explained. "Pretty sweet right?"

"Yeah it is." Lex said as it wore off.

"Now that is a useful trick." Ranger observed.

"Argh," Saturn groaned as he got to his feet.

"What else cam your guitar do?" Brad asked.

"When I'm outnumbered, I've got the perfect solo to bring in some back up." He played the solo can called out, "CALL OF THE WILD!" suddenly several creatures that appeared to be some kind of boar/motorcycle hybrids appeared.

"What the hell?" Rex gasped.

"These are Razorfire Boars." Eddie put the guitar on his back. "They're pretty fierce, and one fast ride." Eddie jumped on ones back and sped around the yard like a motorcycle. "WWWOOOOOO!"

"That is awesome!" Saturn smiled in excitement before jumping on a Razorfire Boars back. "Lets ride!" But the creature didn't move. "Come on, giddy-up." The boar remained still and looked bored. "Move you stupid pig!" He slammed his fist on its head. The boars eyes widened and it let out a angry screech. "Uh oh." Saturn screamed as the Razorfire Boar raced foreword at top speed before it purposefully drove into a statue to throw Black Saturn off its back and to the ground. "Damn it!" Saturn pushed himself up, but then noticed the rest of the Razorfire Boars had surrounded him. "Oh no." He tired to run but they rammed into him, knocking him to the ground and repeated attacked.

"Holy Shit!" Cooch gasped.

"HEY! HEY!" Eddie pulled up between Saturn and the attacking Razorfire Boars. "Easy!" They stopped attacking. "You really shouldn't piss them off."

"Ow," Saturn was battered and bruised.

"Can you summon other creatures?" Robobot asked.

"Oh yeah," Eddie began to count them off. "ground Urchins. Raptor Elk, Tollusks, Reaper Steeds, Lazer Panthers, Sickle Wraiths, Guillotars and the mighty Hextadon."

Ranger raised an eyebrow, "are those things real?"

"Very real." Zenith said. "How did you gain the loyalty of such beasts?"

"I hunted them." Eddie said simply. "Outdoing this weird hunter in the process."

"Gotta say Eddie, I am impressed." Rex smiled.

"Thanks." Eddie stepped off the Razorfire Boar, it sped off to join the others but they all disappeared after a couple of minutes. "I'm a roadie, I keep the trash off the stage."

"Okay," Saturn raised a hand. "Thats a pretty good catchphrase."

"You speak the truth Eddie." Zenith smiled. "You may see yourself as simply a roadie, but I what I see a hero."

"Agreed." Rex smiled "Eddie Riggs, welcome to the League of Freedom."

"YEAH!" Eddie cheered and strummed away on his guitar.

The League applauded as their newest member played. Ranger whispered to Rex, "can we you some of that extra funding to soundproof his room?"

 **(HERO APPROVED)**


	6. Duncan (Firebreather)

**Hey everybody! For those of you who haven't seen Firebreather, spoiler alert. I recommend watching it, its awesome.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Supermansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.**

 **Supermansion Unlimited**

"Duncan Rosenblatt." Rex read the resume.

"Hey," Duncan smiled.

Ranger raised an eyebrow, "Rosenblatt?"

"Quiet!" Rex snapped. "According to this, you're half dragon?"

"On my fathers side." Duncan shrugged.

"This sounds more like a practical joke than a try out." Ranger crossed his rms.

"I am getting strange readings from him." Robobot spoke up as he scanned him.

"Okay Duncan. If your really part dragon, then lets see you breath some fire?" Black Saturn challenged.

"Sure." Duncan breathed a stream of fire into the air above the Leagues heads.

"Whoa!" Cooch gasped as the fire ceased.

"I'm convinced." Brad blinked.

"Check this out." Duncan blew a ring of fire off to the side which then curved around and passed over everyones heads before stopping above Portia's head. "Pretty cool right?"

"Good control," she observed.

"Impressive." Ranger said, "and may I say Portia, a halo of fire really brings out your eyes."

"Thank you Ranger." Portia smiled as the flames disappeared.

"Hows that for flirting?" He whispered to Rex.

"Not bad." Rex admitted.

"Hold up guys." Saturn got out of his chair.

"Saturn sit down before you get hurt, again." Robobot said.

"What good is fire breath if your fighting somebody that's fireproof?" He stood next to Duncan. "Or wearing a fireproof suit. Which my new suit is."

"Looks just like your regular suit." Cooch pointed out.

"Looks can be deceiving," he smirked. "This suit is totally fireproof. I didn't change the design cause, you don't mess with perfection."

Lex covered her face with her hand. "I can't believe I actually dated him."

"Go on, breath fire on me." Saturn said

"Are you serious?" Duncan asked.

"Relax, this suit was made by the same guy who made my rocket boots." Saturn assured him

"Didn't you end up with a concussion after flying directly into the wall?" Brad asked.

"The sun was in my eyes! Look, my point is he makes quality goods." Saturn said. "He even finished this suit in a couple of days before he had to leave the country for some reason."

"Leave the country?" Portia raised an eyebrow. "Ah Saturn?"

"Light me up!" He held his arms out. Duncan shrugged before breathing fire at his feet. Saturns eyes widened as his pants caught on fire. "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" He screamed as he began running around before he dropped to the ground and rolled around. He was then sprayed by a fire extinguisher courtesy of American Ranger.

"Don't feel bad," he told Duncan. "This was Saturns own stupidly at work."

The spraying stopped and Black Saturn sat up. "Argh, what just happened?"

"It sounds like the man you bought all this stuff from was in serious legal trouble and needed to get out of the country, but decided to grab some quick cash by selling you a fireproof suit that isn't actually fire proof." Robobot summarised.

"Didn't you test it when you got it?" Rex asked.

"Um," Saturn looked away.

"Of course you didn't." Rex shook his head as Saturn got and slowly made his way back to his seat. "It says here being half Dragon enhances all of your natural abilities."

"I know what that like." Ranger smiled. "Strength, speed, agility, endurance and reflexes all above that of the average American citizen.

"Given the growing obesity epidemic, that's not saying much." Robobot pointed out.

"Interesting. The enhanced thing, not the fat people thing." Saturn said. "Then, CATCH!" He threw a Saturn ring straight at Duncan's face but he caught it with both hands.

"Impressive." Rex smiled.

"Sure," Saturn looked away. "You really, YAH!" He threw several more rings. Duncan smirked before tossing the first ring into the air and proceeded to catch the others and tossed them into the air two. As they began to fall, he caught each one a casually tossed them into a garbage can.

Duncan held his arms out, "Ta-da!"

The League members applauded, except for Black Saturn who crossed his arms and looked away. "Nice moves." Lex said.

"Did your Dragon Dad teach you to catch?" Ranger asked.

"No." Duncan shook his head. "See my Dad isn't just a dragon, hes the king of the Kaiju."

"Whats a Kaiju?" Brad asked.

"They are a race of giant monsters, originally thought to only exist in legend." Robobot explained.

"Oh they're real alright." Duncan said. "My Dad is Belloc."

"Searching for Belloc, King of the-holt shit." The robot gasped as he displayed a holo screen showing Belloc.

"Dear God!" Ranger gasped

Rexs eyes widened, "hes a big one."

"Damn dude! That's your Dad?" Cooch asked and Duncan nodded. "Hes huge! How'd he and your Mom bone?"

"Cooch!" Portia snapped.

"Look at him." Cooch pointed to the holo image. "I mean even if she were on top-"

"Please stop!" Duncan cut her off. "I've had a lot of questions but that is not one of them."

"Maybe we should change the subject." Lex suggested. "So King of the Kaiju and a human woman, how'd that happen?"

"Wait I thought we weren't talking about people have sex with dragons anymore?" Saturn said.

"Cause if we're still on that, I never an answer on how the boning worked out." Cooch spoke up.

"Oh dear God!" Ranger shut his eyes and shook his head. "I'm picturing it in my mind."

"I meant how they met!" Lex snapped.

"Oh you know the old story." Duncan shrugged. "Guy goes on destructive rampage in New York, meets girl who wasn't afraid of him. They fell in love, which stopped a war and saved the human race from the Kaiju. They even got married and had me, but later got divorced."

"Child of divorce." Portia said. "That must have bin tough to grow up with."

"Had move around a lot. Mom wanted me to go to school and study. Dad wanted me to conquer the earth and succeed his throne. So yeah," Duncan shrugged, "normal parent stuff."

"Dad issues huh?" Lex nodded. "I get it. Mine abandoned me and blasted me in the face with his arm cannon."

"Hey!" Rex protested.

"Mine had my mom abducted to have me fight the kidnapper as a test. Then threw me in lava." Duncan replied.

"I see you left out the part where you were trying to murder me and bomb the planet." Rex said to his daughter. "Wait," he then turned back to Duncan. "Did you say lava?"

"Don't worry he wasn't trying to kill me. He did it to make me transform." Duncan explained.

"Define transform?" Robobot asked.

"Its easier if I just show you," he took off his jacket and threw it onto a statue. Duncan's eyes turned green, his teeth became sharper, several small horns protruded from his forehead , his hands and feet became red and clawed as the latter burst though his shoes. He tore off the remains of his tattered shirt and stood before the league in his Kaiju form.

"You look hardcore." Lex observed.

"This part took some getting used to." Duncan looked at his claws. "But its come through a lot in fights."

"Any other Kaiju traits or habits?" Portia asked.

"I eat coal for a snack." Duncan shrugged. "That weird enough?"

"Duncan I've bin at this for over seventy years." Rex said. "Trust me, that's not even in the top twenty weirdest things I've heard."

Suddenly loud popping sounds were heard and everyone looked to the side where fire crackers were going off. "What the-" Duncan was cut off when he was run over by Saturn's car.

Saturn stuck his head out the window. "PHYSC!"

They rest of the League looked in shock.

"Did you just run him over?" Brad asked.

"What is wrong with you!?" Rex snapped.

"Hes an f***ing idiot. That's what." Lex said.

"Is Duncan dead?" Cooch asked.

"He'll be fine," Saturn waved it off, "he's got enhanced toughness or whatever. The important thing is, Black Saturn comes out on TOP!" He began blasting music from the car.

"We should call an ambulance." Portia said.

Coochs ears picked a noise, "anybody hear angry growling?"

Suddenly the car began to rise as Duncan lifted it above his head.

"Well we can add super strength to the list." Robobot noted.

"Ah guys," Brad looked worried. "Why does he have the same look as Cooch when shes in the wild for too long?"

Duncan indeed a look of rage on his face and with an angry yell he threw the car across the yard.

"AAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Saturn screamed, just managing to put on his seatbelt before the front of the car hit the ground. "Phew," he let out a breath in relief. Only to scream again as it tipped over and fell, now leaving it upside down.

"Okay Black Saturn's car has officially been trashed." Robobot spoke up. "Who bet trashed?"

"Me! Right here!" Brad, Ranger and Rex all raised their hands.

"Damn it." Lex said "I was sure it was gonna get blown up."

Saturn removed his seatbelt, causing him to fall on his head "Shit!" He opened the door and pulled himself out, only to see an angry Duncan glaring at him. "So, lets call this one a draw huh?"

Duncan responded by breathing a large stream of fire at him. Saturn screamed and ran away as the flames hit the car, causing it to explode.

"And it just blew up." Robobot noted. "Looks like everybody wins."

"Alright I won!" Cooch cheered, not really grasping the situation.

Saturn kept running but Duncan quickly caught up to him and ran past him to jump onto and off a wall to roundhouse kick Saturn in the face. Then proceeded to punch Saturn repeatedly in the face and gut before grabbing him, spinning him around and threw him through the air and into a wall where he stuck to it for a second before falling off to the ground. Duncan approached the downed Saturn, grabbed him by one of the rings on his mask and lifted him up before pulling back his fist. Duncan suddenly was grabbed from behind and thrown backwards but he landed on his feet and looked to see Rex.

"Stand down." The Subtopian warned.

Duncan was too angry to listen and used his fire breath but Rex flew above it and shoulder charged Duncan knocking him backwards. The hybrid leapt at Rex who side stepped the attack and palm struck him with his titanium hand. Duncan swung at Rex but the Subtopian blocked the attacks, moved behind Duncan and wrapped his arms around him to restrain him. "Calm down!"

Duncan struggled for a few more seconds before his senses returned. He looked around and saw Saturn picking himself off the ground, "Oh no."

"Don't worry," Rex released him, "your not the first one to beat the crap out of Black Saturn."

"At this point it'd be strange if an applicant didn't beat up Saturn." Robobot said.

"I think we just discovered your weakness." Rex said.

"You've got some major rage dude." Cooch observed.

"Scary thing is, I don't know if that angers from my Kaiju side or from me." Duncan said sadly.

"We all have out own demons Duncan," Portia said. "But whats important is that we face those demons and become stronger for it."

"I've have," Duncan began. "I've fought other Kaiju that tried to kill me, to kill my friends and family. I beat them, I wanted to kill them but I didn't."

"Its not easy showing mercy to an enemy." Ranger said.

"Especially when half your DNA is telling you otherwise." Lex added, thinking about her insect half. "It takes a lot of strength."

"You ever fight a leprechaun?" Cooch asked.

Duncan blinked in confusion, "ah what?"

"Leprechauns!" The hyper evolved cat held her claws up. "The most terrifying creatures on Earth!"

"Cooch what are you talking about?" Portia asked.

"Leprechauns are magic, hes magic." She pointed to Duncan. "Maybe hes barbequed some of those freaks with his fire breath."

"Actually Kaiju aren't magic." Duncan pointed out. "They were actually brought to Earth by aliens millions of years ago."

"Wait you saying they're from outer space?" Rex asked.

"Yeah the aliens brought the Kaiju here to wipe them out. Its didn't end too well for them." Duncan explained.

"Okay, didn't expect that." Robobot said. "Anything else we should know?"

"Actually I do have one more trick up my sleeve." Duncan smirked. Suddenly two large wings sprouted from his back and he flew into the air.

"That's pretty awesome." Brad said.

"Big deal!" Saturn snapped as he sat back into his seat. "Everyone else who can fly doesn't need wings."

"Saturn, you hit him with your car. You can't complain that that he trashed your car and kicked your ass, which you deserved." Portia said sternly. "I had the car blows up."

"Us two." Cooch gestured to herself and Lex.

"Wait, you guys were betting on if bad things happening to my car?" Saturns asked.

"Not if something bad happened to your car, what would happened to it." Lex clarified.

"Ending up at the bottom of the ocean was an option two." Brad spoke up. "But everybody figured that was a little farfetched."

"Well jokes on you guys," Saturn narrowed his eyes at them, "cause I got insurance this time."

"You, actually learned from your mistakes?" Robobot said in amazement.

"Yep," he smirked. "Got a great deal two. Turns out in addition to making custom made gear like rocket boots and fire proof suits, my guy also provides…" It then dawned on Saturn he'd been screwed over twice by the same person. "SON OF A BITCH!"

"And everything is back to normal" Robobot said.

Duncan landed in front of the League and retracted his wings before returning to normal.

"I must say Duncan, I am very impressed." Portia smiled. "You've shown strength beyond your physical abilities. To overcome your anger and show compassion, even to someone who wishes you harm."

"Agreed," Rex nodded. "But tell me, have you decided on what your superhero name will be?"

The hybrid smirked. "Call me Firebreather."

"Well then Firebreather," Rex smiled placing a hand on his shoulder, "welcome to the League of Freedom."

The rest of the League gave applause for their newest member. Except for Saturn who just pouted. "That son of a bitch is giving me a refund or I'm gonna kick his little piggy ass." He reached for his phone, but found his pockets were empty. "Hey wheres my phone?"

 _"DROID!"_ Everyone heard the sound coming from the burning wreck of Saturn's car.

"I think its in there." Cooch pointed out.

"SHIT!" Saturn jumped to his feet. "My custom ring tones!" He ran over to the car.

"Should, we help him?" Duncan asked.

"He'll never learn if we do." Rex said simply. "Though he probably won't learn either way."

"OW!" Saturn pulled his hand back out of the flames. "Almost got it," he reached in again, "OW!"

 **(HERO APPROVED)**

 **Firebreather was also a comic book. This version of Firebreather was from the movie but I threw in a couple of elements from the comic. Hope you all enjoyed it. Oh and please check out my other new story "Replace and Amaze" I think you'll like it.**


	7. Stewie Griffin (Family Guy)

**Good evening. I hope your all ready for the latest audition.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Supermansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.**

 **Supermansion Unlimited**

"Todays candidate seems to be running late." Robobot observed as the League waited.

"Guess we can cross off super speed or teleportation as their powers." Lex joked.

Suddenly a young baby in overalls walked into the yard. "Hello there little fella," Ranger smiled. "Did you lose your Mommy?"

"How dare imply I need that vile woman to watch over me." He snapped.

"What the hell?" Rexs eyes widened.

"Allow me to introduce myself, Stewart Gilligan Griffin." He smiled. "But you can call me Stewie."

"Your Stewie?" Portia blinked in shock before looking at the resume. "I didn't think you'd be so-"

"Handsome?" Stewie smirked before waving it off. "Oh lots of people make that mistake."

"How old are you?" Rex asked.

"A little over one." Stewie replied.

"Your only a year old?" Lex gasped.

"Indeed. But don't be fooled by my youth, I think find I'm quite accomplished." Stewie assured them.

"So your already potty trained?" Ranger asked.

"Um," Stewie looked away, "not quite But moving on. Now while I don't possess any actual super powers," Stewie admitted. "I have genius intellect like no other!" He took out some papers and handed them out, "heres a list of just some of the incredible inventions I've made."

Lex read them off. "Laser guns, jetpacks, robots, simulation machine, teleportation machine, a shrink ray."

"Literal rocket skies!" Saturn said in amazement. "Awesome!"

"Really?" Robobot looked at him. "You hear teleportation device and shrink ray, but get excited over rocket skies."

"A time machine!" Brad gasped. "Are you serious?"

"Very," Stewie nodded.

"This is incredible." Robobot looked through the list.

"Ah," Cooch couldn't read most of the list so she decided to change the subject. "Have you ever tried being a superhero before?"

"Well, I did have a brief superhero career as Toaster Man." Stewie replied. "But it kind of ran its course."

"I've heard of Toaster Man," Ranger spoke up. "He saved the Presidents breakfast."

"Breakfast?" Black Saturn snorted. "Big deal. Have you ever tangled with a super villain?"

"Oh I assure you, I'm no slouch when it comes to combat." Stewie began. "I'm skilled in hand to hand combat, knifes, guns and explosives. So much so I've defeated terrorists, traffickers, my half brother Bertram's attempt to erase me from time, I even singled headedly defeated Crippletron."

"Who the hell is Crippletron?" Brad raised an eyebrow.

"Long story," Stewie began. "It all started when the fat man bought footie pajamas, that I can only assume were made for a hippo doing a commercial of some sort of commercial."

"Wait, wait a second," Rex cut in. "What do you mean, erase you from existence?"

"Well you see, Bertram used my time machine to go back in time to the Renaissance. So he could kill my ancestor, Leonardo Da Vinci." Stewie said.

"O. M. God!" Lex gasped. "Your related to Leonardo Da Vinci?"

"I know right?" Stewie smiled with excitement. "I'm actually Italian. Which explains my love of spaghettios and smoking on the toilet."

"Gross." Rex said.

"Hold on." Saturn spoke up. "Why the hell did he go back that far, couldn't he have just went back before you were born and killed your Dad?"

"For the first time in history, Saturn actually makes a good point." Robobot said.

"Ah but remember, Bertram is my half brother. So he couldn't have killed the fat man or any recent ancestors on my fathers side. He had to back enough generations to make sure he was snuffing out the ancestral source of my genius without affecting his own." Stewie explained. Which was Leonardo Da Vinci."

"Is that possible?" Portia looked to Robobot, as did everyone else.

"Strange as that sounds, it does track." Robobot confirmed.

"Since your still here," Ranger observed, "I'm guessing you stopped this Bertram?"

"Indeed I did." Stewie smiled. "With an arrow in his skull."

"You killed your own brother?" Rex gasped.

"With a crossbow." Stewie nodded. "Right before I did I asked him whats his favourite bottled water. Mines Arrowhead."

"Nice!" Saturn smiled.

"How could you kill your own brother?" Rex asked.

"Come on man he was trying to kill me!" Stewie exclaimed. "Not to mention he was a total dick."

"Stewie, its undeniable how impressive it is that you were able to create all these things all by yourself and at such a young age." Portia said.

"Oh stop," Stewie smiled.

"But I am a little concerned about some of these." She looked at the list. "Mind Control Device, Carbonite Freeze gun, a weather control device, Hypnotic Control Device, Mass Hypnosis device?"

"The first is for a single person, the other is for extreme numbers of people." Stewie explained.

"Yeah, we figured that much." Robobot said.

"This sounds like a list of a mad scientist." Ranger observed. "Or a super villain."

"Okay look, yes I've done plenty of bad things, but I don't anymore." Stewie said. "At least not as much."

"Hold on," Rex narrowed his eyes, "Have you, killed other people?"

Stewie didn't answered right away. "Maybe."

"Okay I call bullshit on this whole thing." Saturn got out of his seat and stood next to Stewie. "Look at him. Theres no way a weak baby could kill anybody."

"What the deuce!?" Stewie recoiled in shock. "Did you just call me weak? Well hows this for weak!" He jumped up punching Black Saturn in the groin.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Saturn screamed falling to his knees. But Stewie wasn't finished. He jumped again, grabbing onto one of the rings on Saturn's mask and repeatedly punched him in the face. He swung on the ring to kick him a couple of times before winging into the air and brought his elbow down on Saturns face knocking him face onto the dirt. "That's right bitch! You in my house now!"

The League sat their in shock at what they just saw. "Holy shit man." Cooch gasped.

"That baby has some serious rage." Brad said.

"Robobot, please tell me you recorded that?" Lex asked.

"Of course," the robot nodded. "I send you a copy."

"Congratulations Saturn, you've been beaten up by a baby." American Ranger deadpanned.

"As you can see I'm quite astute when it comes to combat." Stewie gloated.

"You say ass flute?" Cooch asked.

"Eww no." Stewie cringed. "I said astute. Though I suppose it can be a bit difficult to understand my accent."

"Accent? Rex raised an eyebrow.

"I've often been told I have a British accent." Stewie smiled.

"That doesn't sound like a compliment." Ranger stated.

"I don't hear it." Lex shrugged.

Stewies eyes widened. "What?"

"Me neither." Portia said.

"Sorry," Brad said.

"I detect no of trace of an accent." Robobot added.

"Damn you all!" Stewie snapped.

"Whoa easy there little fella." Ranger said.

"Don't talk down to me." Stewie pointed at him. "I've created the universe! Just ask Brian, he saw me do it."

"Who the hell is Brain?" Rex asked.

"Brian is my friend. He accompanies me on many of my adventures." Stewie explained.

"So hes like your sidekick?" Ranger asked.

Stewie thought for a moment. "Yeah, yeah hes pretty much my sidekick."

"I'M NOT YOUR SIDEKICK!" Someone out of sight shouted.

"Brian?" Stewie blinked. "Are you ease dropping?"

Brian walked into view. "No. I'm a dog, I have very good hearing."

"Dog!" Cooch jumped out of her seat.

"Fascinating," Robobot tilted his head. "Are another of Stewie's creations?"

"No way," Stewie shook his head. "I could never make that big of a douche."

"Shut up." Brian said before facing the heroes. "No, I'm all natural. Brian Griffin, you've probably heard of me from my book. Faster Than the Speed of Love."

"So we're just ignoring that, created the universe comment?" Robobot asked.

"I've heard of that book." Portia said. "They said it was so bad not only were all copies returned, it turned millions away from reading."

Brian lost his smile. "Oh, well that's a little harsh."

"Yeah, and the only reason it wasn't voted Worst Novel ever Written was cause it didn't qualify as a novel." Lex mentioned.

"Well critics are always negative." He tried to defend his work.

"I once attempted to read that book to gain a better understanding of Humanity." Robobot spoke up. "But after reading a few pages, my systems shut down from the plot holes, un relatable and un inert resting characters, pointless filler-"

"F*** you!" Brian snapped. "What do you know about writing?"

"Judging from your book, a lot more than you do." Robobot quipped.

"Burn!" Saturn pushed himself up.

"Hey I'm a serious writer!" Brian snapped.

"Then why do you write that phoney self help book?" Portia asked. "Wish It, Want It, Do It."

"Uh," Brian tried to think of a response.

"I thought you looked familiar." Rexs eyes widened. "You were on Real Time with Bill Maher."

"Would have figured the fact he was a dog that talked would have made you remember seeing him before." Robobot said.

"Hey I've seen lots of things talk that shouldn't talk in my time." Rex said before narrowing his eyes at Brian. "They kept pointing out all the flaws and crap in your book until you cracked and admitted you wrote it in a day and even you thought it was crap."

"I saw that!" Saturn got to his feet. "He totally wet himself and got chased off stage. Hold on I'll find the video," he took out his phone.

Brians eyes widened, "ah theres no need to-"

"Found it!" Saturn interrupted and held up his phone to the others.

 _"Look just tell me what you want me to say!" Brian begged._

 _"Ben hes urinating." Arianna pointed out._

 _"Oh s***." Dana cringed in disgust._

 _"That's it." Bill slammed a newspaper on the table. "Outside! No, no, no! Outside! Outside Now!" Brian barked while running off stage on all fours. "Outside! You get outside!"_

"Dear God man." Ranger shook his head. "Have you no respect for yourself?"

"I can't believe you wet yourself on live TV." Lex cringed.

"I can't believe Saturn watches Real Time with Bill Maher." Robobot said.

"Oh I don't." Saturn put his phone away. "Was just channel surfing while I was waiting for Europes Funniest Nut Shots to start."

"That I believe." The robot deadpanned.

"Get outta here!" Cooch yelled. "No dogs allowed!"

"Hey back off!" Brian snapped. "It's a free country." He took out his flask but Cooch knocked it out of his hand. "What the hell!"

"Sorry, thought you had a gun." Cooch said.

Brian picked up the flask only to find all the booze had dripped out. "You know what? I'm sorry."

"For what?" Cooch asked.

"For this!" He swung a fist at her, but she leaned back to dodge it before kicking him in the face and knocking him to the ground.

"That might have gone better if you hadn't yelled, for this!" Stewie pointed out.

Brian got to his feet and raised his fists. "That's it! You wanna go bitch? Then bring it!" He growled before running at Cooch and tried to bite her. But she easily dodged him and punched him in the face before she began fiercely slashing him with her claws.

The rest of the league were all yelling to stop when Brad grabbed her from behind to pull the cat off of the dog. "Cooch its okay! Its over!"

Brian had many claw marks across his whole body and groaned in pain. "You know what?" Stewie spoke up. "Theres a pussy joke here somewhere but for the life of me I can't think of one."

"I think I need to go to the hospital." Brian groaned.

"Wait a second," Cooch sniffed the air. "Aw man, I think he shit himself."

"No I didn't!" Brian snapped before sniffing the air. "Oh Stewie you didn't."

"I got scared when everybody started screaming." He admitted.

"Oh God I can smell it from here." Lex covered her nose.

"Come on its diaper. They smell bad get over it." Stewie rolled his eyes. "But speaking of which, little help?" Everyone who wasn't setting down took a step back. "Oh come on." Stewie exclaimed. "Ms Jones your all about helping people. Help a baby out?"

"Oh hell no." Portia shook her head.

"Blast you vile woman!" Stewie snapped.

"What the hell did you just call me!?" Portia stood up.

"Noting!" Stewie held his hands up out his fear. Then his eyes widened, "Uh oh, second arrival."

"Oh Jesus he crapped himself again." Robobot realised.

"Seriously someone needs to take care of this, before we can talk about my joining." Stewie pointed out. "I'm gonna get a rash."

"That wont be necessary." Rex flew out of his chair and landed in front of him. "Stewie you- Oh Christ!" Rex held his nose. "Smells like rotting corpses."

"Oh thank you for making me more self conscious." Stewie glared at him.

"The point is you are not joining the League of Freedom." Rex declared.

"What?" The baby gasped. "Why not?"

"First, your a baby. No way letting you join is legal." Rex pointed out. "Second, you've clearly got a dark side and have admitted to murdering people."

"Hey I had good reason for most of them." Stewie defended. "Well, half of them."

"Finally, you literally just crapped yourself, twice." The Subtopian said. "Even Black Saturns never done that."

"That's right." Saturn crossed his arms smugly.

"No he just pukes a lot." Robobot said. "He couldn't even do the slow space walk without losing his lunch."

"Hey!" Saturn said.

Rex shook his head. "Sorry Stewie, but your not League material."

"Is that right?" Stewie narrowed his eyes at the Subtopian. "You think I'm not good enough? Well Damn you all!" Stewie snapped. "How good is THIS!" He pulled out a hand gun and fired, but the bullet bounced of Rexs chest and hit Stewie in the foot. "AAAHHHHH!" He dropped the gun and held his foot.

"Yeah," Rex put his hands on his hips. "I'm bullet-proof."

"Oh yeah?" Stewie grit his teeth. "Then I guess I'll have to try HARDER!" He pulled out a laser gun a and fired. But like the bullet, the blast bounced off Rexs chest and into his foot. "GOD DAMN IT!"

"Incredible." Robobot scanned. "The laser hit exact same spot as the bullet."

"Stewie are you alright?" Brian asked.

"DO I LOOK ALIRIGHT!?" The baby shouted back.

"This is weird even by League standards." Lex observed.

"I already called an ambulance." Portia Portia put her phone away. "It'll be here a couple of minutes. Hey where did he go?" They all looked to see Stewie was gone.

"Ugh," Cooch sniffed the air. "He close. That shitty diapers a dead give away."

Suddenly Stewie returned in a small hover vehicle with a drill on the front. "Don't be alarmed. This is just a DRILL!" He pressed a button and the drill began spinning as he drove at Rex. The Subtopian just looked bored and reached out, grabbing the drill with his titanium hand stopping it instantly. This caused the rest of the hover vehicle to spin around instead. "AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" Stewie screamed as he spun around. "Someone help!"

"Should, we do something?" Ranger asked.

"I kinda wanna see what happens next." Brad said.

"Oh God I'm gonna puke!" Stewie cried before he began to barf as he spun, some of it hitting Brian in the face.

"ARGH!" He wiped it out of his eyes.

Stewie managed to unbuckled his seatbelt and was thrown from the hover vehicle before landing on his face. Rex pressed a button and it stopped spinning. "You done now?"

"That's all you have to say?" Brian got to his feet. "I should call the cops on you so called superheroes."

"On what charges?" Robobot asked.

"Assault." Brian said.

"You both attacked first," Robobot pointed out. "So what we did was self defence."

"Animal cruelty." Brian gestured to himself.

"Cooch is a cat and you are a dog. This was an animal attacking another animal. That's just nature." The robot countered.

"It wasn't so much a fight as was an ass kicking." Lex pointed out.

"Yeah well," Brian thought for a second. "Defamation of character."

"Your whole character is a giant defecation." Robobot quipped.

"BURN!" Saturn shouted as the others laughed.

"SHUT UP!" Brian yelled.

"What are you gonna do? Write another shitty book and read it to us?" Rex challenged. "Now sit."

Brian narrowed his eyes at him. "The f*** did you just say to me?"

"I said," Rex held the hover vehicle with both hands before easily crushing it into a ball of scrap metal, "sit." Brians eyes widened and he sat down right away. "That's what I thought." He tossed the scraps aside. "Now this audition is over and I think its time for both of you to leave."

"Well then I guess that's it Lets go Brian." Stewie and Brain stood up before they both walked away. "Oh, there is one more thing." Stewie stopped and turned around. "I've got one more catchphrase. Victory shall be mine!" He held up a high tech grenade. A pressed a button and it started flashing before throwing it at Rex, who swatted it away with his titanium hand. It landed underneath a prius which was blown to pieces when the grenade exploded.

"MY CAR!" Brian shouted.

"You drive a prius?" Ranger raised an eyebrow. "Looks like Rex did you a favour."

"Ha!" Saturn laughed. "Its funny when its someone else's car."

Stewie looked at the burning wreckage. "I'm ah, just gonna wait for the ambulance. Come on Brian." With that he limped away.

"I swear to God if I wasn't in so much pain, I would kick your ass Stewie." Brian followed him.

The Heroes were silent for a few moments until Rex broke it. "They can't sue us for anything can they?"

"No." Robobot shook his head. "Legally speaking all injuries and damages were either in self defence or they're own doing."

"Good." Rex smiled.

 **(HERO DENIED)**

 **Stewie is more mad scientist than superhero. Plus Brian is definitely his sidekick. Speaking of Superheroes, how awesome is Young Justice Outsiders? We waited a long time for it and it hasn't dissapointed.**


	8. Archer (Archer)

**WARNING! If you have never seen Archer, then brace yourselves cause this chapter contains some crazy stuff and I mean REALLY CRAZY! Lets say this is set near the end of Season 7.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Supermansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.**

 **Supermansion Unlimited**

"Another late applicant." Rex sighed.

"Its not like the mansions hard to find." Brad pointed out.

Suddenly a man in a suit walked in eating a burrito. "I'm here."

"Archer I presume?" Rex asked.

"Sterling Archer," he smirked. "The worlds greatest spy."

"That doesn't sound like something you should go around telling people." Robobot pointed out.

Archer raised an eyebrow, "then why bother?"

"Makes sense to me." Saturn said.

"What time do you call this solider?" Ranger asked.

"Ah," Archer looked at his watch, "3:09pm."

"Your appointment was a 2pm." Rex said. "Your over an hour late."

"Hey its not my fault the line was so long." Archer took a bite of his burrito. "Man, you wouldn't believe how hard it was to find a place that was still making breakfast burritos."

"Considering places stopped serving breakfast over four hours ago, I think we can imagine." Portia said.

"Lets move on." Rex said. "So you're part of a secret spy agency?"

"Well I used to part of ISIS." This made everyone gasp. "Not that ISIS!" Archer corrected. "We were a spy agency way before those terrorist dicks stole our name."

"So what kind of spy stuff did you do?" Cooch asked.

"Oh you know, travelled the world, went undercover, while charming many beautiful women." Archer smiled.

"Combat experience?" Robobot asked.

"Hmm, I'd have to say a shit tone." Archer held his arms out. "I fought KGB, terrorists, ninjas, sexy ninjas, mercenaries, double agents, cyborgs, pirates and space pirates."

"Did you say space pirates?" Lex asked.

"There was a mutiny on the international space station." Archer said casually.

"Wonder why we weren't called about that?" Rex wondered out loud.

"Hey that reminds me. I've already got an arch enemy." Archer realised.

"The space pirates?" Cooch asked.

"No, they're all dead." Archer shook his head. "I'm talking about Barry the Bionic Ducehbag Dillon."

Saturn raised an eyebrow, "bionic?"

"The KGB turned him into a cyborg." Archer began. "Then he killed my fiancé at our wedding, took over the KGB, killed the former leader who turned him into a cyborg, crashed my wedding and stole my fiancé, tried to kill me like three times and kidnapped my mother."

"Damn dude." Cooch said.

"You know," Rex spoke up. "Sometimes a person unknowingly creates their own arch enemy."

"Like how you slept with Dr Devizos wife, driving him insane and seeking revenge." Robobot pointed out.

"Thank you Robobot," the Subtopian glared at him before turning to Archer. "Can you think of anything you might have done to this Barry to make him hate you so much?"

"Ah," Archer thought for a moment.

 _Flashback_

 _Barry falling off a balcony in Berlin._

 _Barry walking in on Archer and Framboise having sex._

 _Barry falling off a fire escape._

 _Barrys ship getting destroyed, leaving him stranded on the space station._

 _Barry being shot by explosive shotgun rounds, then being blown up in the grain elevator._

Present Time

"Nope, nothing I can think of." Archer shrugged. "Look I'm perfect for this team." He took out his flask. "I mean, at the very least I'd bring some desperately needed style."

"I beg your pardon?" Ranger gestured to his costume. "I'm wearing the colours of this great country."

"Yeah, I'm sure when Betsy Ross made the American flag she hopped a guy in an eagle hat would wear it." Archer chuckled.

Suddenly Rex shivered. "Dad whats wrong?" Lex asked.

"I don't know." He looked around. "Its like some terrible evil force is coming. Something worse than anything I've ever faced in my entire life of fighting supervillans."

"Wow," Archer chuckled. "Sounds like your describing my-"

"STERLING!"

"Oh God Damn it." Archer groaned as Mallory walked in.

"Sterling Mallory Archer," she approached her son.

"Mother what are you doing here?" Archer asked.

"What do you think!?" Mallory snapped at him "When Carol told me you'd run off to join a team of superheroes, I'd thought she was just drifting further and further away from what little sanity she had left."

"Hold on a second," Saturn spoke up. "Your middle name is Mallory?" Everyone chuckled.

"Shut up." Archer glared at him before turning to his mother. "So what if I am?"

"I didn't raise you to prance around wearing tights." Mallory said.

"Okay A, you didn't raise me, Woodhouse did." Archer pointed out. "And B, I was never going to wear tights! I was going to wearing either my suit or my black turtleneck." Archer said.

"Ahem," they turned their attention to the League, mainly Portia. "So your Archers mother?"

"Mallory Archer," she introduced herself. "Former spy master."

"Pleasure to meet you Mrs Archer." Ranger nodded.

"Oh its Ms." Mallory smiled.

Archer gave her a look, "really?"

"Shut up." She glared at him, "and you are not joining this team. I've already had to bail you out of trouble enough times in your life and I am not rescuing you from supervillains."

"When have I ever needed rescuing?" Archer asked.

"Lets see," Mallory began counting them off. "The police, your boarding schools, the FBI, the CIA, Interpol, and the Canadian Mounties. Not to mention that time you bought not one but TWO time shares!"

"What kind of idiot buys two time shares?" Rex laughed.

"Even Staturns not that dumb." Brad said.

"Yeah." Black Saturn smirked. While everyone waited for him to realise he was just insulted, Mallory and Archer kept arguing.

"How you turned out like this, I'll never know." Mallory said.

"Hmm," Archer placed a hand under his chin, "maybe it has something to do with the fact I never had a father. Because you've slept so many, MANY different men, most of whom were married, that you haven't the slightest idea who my father actually is!"

"Well this got uncomfortable fast." Portia said.

"I have a reasonable idea of who it could be!" Mallory snapped. "Besides you had nothing to complain about. I made sure you had the best of everything, not that you every appreciated any of it."

"Will you stop nagging me!" Archer exasperated. "Have you bin taking lessons from-"

"ARCHER!"

"God damn it." Archer sighed as Lana walked in. "Why are you here?"

"I'm here to ask why you didn't show up to our daughters parent teacher conference at Pre Pre like you were supposed to!" She snapped at him.

"I never agreed to that." Archer said.

"Yes you did!" Lana shot back.

"Well I clearly didn't mean it!" He snapped.

"Typical Archer." Lana rolled her eyes. "Never owns up to his promises or his responsibilities."

"Shut up." Archer said.

"Out of curiously." Robobot spoke up. "How did you get out of two time shares?"

"Fortunately the owner was reasonable." Mallory explained, "an quite limber."

"AAGGGHHH!" Archer screamed and covered his ears. "I don't want to hear this! AAHHH!" He stopped screaming when Lana smacked him in the back of the head.

"Will you shut up!" She snapped. "And its not like the apple fell from the screwing around tree."

"Whats that supposed to mean?" Archer asked.

"Besides the fact you're a self centred, cheating, asshole who thinks the universe revolves around his dick?" She glared at him.

"Oh Yeah?" Archer challenged. "We if I'm such a screw up, why'd you steal my sperm?"

Rangers eyes widened. "Wait, stole your what?"

"Nothing," Lana said quickly.

"Lana broke into a doctors office where I'd frozen some sperm and stole it, then artificially inseminated herself with it." Archer explained.

The League all had expressions of shock on their faces. "You stole ex boyfriends sperm so you could have his baby?" Rex said in disbelief. "That is the saddest and most desperate thing I have ever heard."

"I try not to judge people." Portia said. "But you have issues."

"That is one baby crazy bitch." Cooch said.

"Right." Archer said.

"You know," Lana glared at him.

"Well they're not wrong." Mallory spoke up. "I mean if the extra large gloves fit."

"Mallory, it was your idea!" Lana snapped.

"Prove it." Mallory said.

"Both of you shut up! Neither of you should be here!" Archer snapped. "Whats next, the rest of the idiots show up?"

"You rang?"

"What!?" Archer gasped as Cyril, Ray, Pam, Cheryl and Krieger walked in. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"We were bored doing nothing at the office." Pam shrugged.

"That and Krieger's newest Pigley died and we needed to let the place air out." Ray said.

"Damn it Krieger!" Mallory snapped. "I thought I told you no more radioactive pigs!"

"I'll have you know Pigley Seven was not radioactive." Krieger put his hands on his hips. "He was genetically modified."

"Is that why burst into flames?" Ray asked.

Krieger paused for a moment, "maybe?"

"HEY!" Rex shouted over them to get their attention.

"Hello." Cyril waved.

"Who are you people?" The Subtopian asked.

"Cyril Figgis," he stepped forward. "Founder and lead investigator of the Figgis Agency." Everyone rolled their eyes at his attempt at gloating. "This is Lana Kane, Pam Poovey, Ray Gillette, Dr Krieger and Cheryl Tunt."

"AAAAHHHHHH!" Saturn screamed before jumping behind Brad.

"Ah, what are you doing?" He asked.

"I recognise that crazy bitch." Saturn pointed at Cheryl. "Shes a Tunt!"

Cooch raised an eyebrow, "a what now?"

"They're a family that's as rich as they are bat shit crazy!" Saturn said.

"Tunt? I know that name." Ranger thought for a moment until his eyes widened. "Cornelius Tunt!"

Lex blinked, "who?"

"Dear God Lex, what did they teach you in school? Cornelius Tunt built almost all the railroads throughout this country." Ranger explained.

"Do I know you?" Cheryl asked Black Saturn.

"My family had dinner with yours and you tried to set me on fire." He said.

"Yeah, your gonna have to be more specific." Cheryl shrugged.

"You burned the whole restaurant down!" Saturn snapped.

"I said MORE SPECIFIC!" She snapped back.

Lexs eyes widened. "Your Cherlene!"

Rex raised an eyebrow, "who?"

"Cherlene, the Queen of Country Music. She was this up and coming country music star whose first album went big." Lex explained. "But I heard there was some kind of fire at the country music awards and she just kinda disappeared."

"Yeah, I have no idea what your talking about." Cheryl said.

"Searching for Cherlene the Queen on Country Music." Robobot brought up a holo screen of Cheryl as Cherlene playing the guitar.

"That's not me." She said.

"But," Lex between her and the picture.

"Don't bother," Ray shook his head. "She can't remember any part of that whole Summer."

"How do you forget an entire Summer?" Portia asked.

"Did she over do it on the drugs?" Brad asked.

"No more than she usually takes." Krieger shrugged as Cheryl opened a bottle of glue and sniffed it.

"Ah hate to interrupt but I think your robots broken." Pam pointed to Robobot who wasn't moving.

"Robobot?" Rex shook his shoulder but got no response. "Are you okay?"

"Hey now that he can't hear us," Archer spoke up. "How sure are you that your robots gonna try and overthrow humanity?"

Cyril pinched the ridge of his nose, "not this again."

"It's a serious issue Cyril!" Archer snapped.

"Allow me!" Krieger took a screwdriver from his lab coat. "I'm a professional."

"Krieger that's a thirteen billion dollar war machine." Cyril pointed out. "Not one of your sex robots."

"Wait what?" Rex blinked.

"Pssh, potato paboto." Krieger waved it off before leaning towards Robobot with the screwdriver to his face, before a metal hand grabbed his wrist.

"Don't you f***ing dare." Robobot said before rapidly punching him in the face, then punched him in the throat. Krieger grasped his throat as he struggled to breath before falling to the ground.

"Robobot, what just happened?" Lex asked.

"I received an email from the CIA." Robobot said.

"The CIA?" Portia raised an eyebrow.

"It was so large I needed a couple of minutes to process it." He explained. "Its from someone called, Slater."

Lanas eyes widened, "oh no."

"It reads as follows:"

 _Attention League of Freedom._

 _First off, thank you for your years of service defending this country. Especially you Titanium Rex, I was actually big fan of yours when I was a kid. So I felt a professional and moral obligation to warn you. SAY AWAY FROM THOSE ASSHOLES!_

 _They are the worst group of drunken, incompetent, sex crazy, f*** ups the world has ever seen and that is not an exaggeration._

 _Not only was their joke of a spy agency illegally conducting espionage operations for years with no authority or permission from the United States Government, which was treason by the way, but they f***ed up ever mission they ever had._

"It wasn't ever mission." Archer said. "Two out of three tops."

 _If you don't believe me, just take a look at this records of all their crimes._

Robobot displayed a holoscreen that began loading a list of crimes. Suddenly a bullet flew through the holo screen, bouncing off Robobots head and hit Black Saturn in the arm.

"ARGH!" Saturn gripped his arm in pain.

Everyone looked to see Archer holding his gun. "Did you just try to shoot me so we wouldn't see all the crimes you've committed?" The robot asked.

Archers eyes looked to the side for a moment. "No." He fired again but the bullet bounced off Robobot and hit Staturns leg.

Saturn fell to the ground. "God Damn it!"

"Will you STOP THAT!" Lana smacked Archer in the back of the head.

"Bullets don't work on robots and cyborgs." Cyril said. "What about this concept is so hard for you to understand?"

"Shut up!" Archer snapped.

"You okay Saturn?" Cooch asked.

"Do I look okay!?" Saturn snapped.

Cooch didn't respond for a moment, "no?"

"Hey!" Pam called out. "Were you related to a guy named Brett by any chance?"

"Dear God." Rex watched as the list of crimes continued to load. "That might be more crimes than I've seen in seventy years of being a superhero."

"Murder, theft, buying stolen goods, transporting stolen goods, smuggling Mexicans across the border." Ranger read the list. "Fake hydrogen bomb threats?"

"That was just one of us." Lana glared at Mallory.

"Shut up," she said.

"Assassinations, destruction of property, arson." Brad read on. "Defiling a corpse? Crimes against man, nature and God?"

"Okay those last ones were all Krieger." Cyril pointed at him.

"Running a cocaine cartel?" Lex blinked.

"Running into the ground was more like it." Ray said.

"That's a funny story actually." Pam began. "See the CAI posed as the FBI and raided our office which is when we found out we were committing treason the whole time. So Ms Archer made a deal we'd get immunity from everything if we sold a ton of cocaine for them."

"What?" Rex gasped.

"We didn't know it was for the CIA at the time." Lana said.

"Why in Gods name would the CIA want you to sell cocaine?" Ranger asked.

"So they could buy arms from Iran to give to a dictator in San Marcos so he could fight the Rebels who were the CIA in the first place all so they could spend their annual budget and ask for an increase next year." Krieger explained while rubbing his throat.

The League all looked at them in shock.

"I know what your thinking, but turns out selling cocaine is actually a lot harder then you'd think." Archer said.

"You got any left?" Brad asked.

"No!" Mallory snapped. "Because these idiots either," points to Archer, "gave it away," Points to Pam, "ate it," points at Krieger "and blew it up!"

"Did you say ate it?" Cooch asked.

"Yeah," Archer nodded. "Pam literally ate, hold on." He thought for a moment. "Yeah literally ate half a ton of it."

"How can you eat half ton of cocaine and still be alive?" Lex asked in disbelief.

"I cannot calculate any possible way any human could survive that." Robobot said.

"Human is debateable." Mallory said.

"Inapropes," Pam glared at her.

"Anyway, I hear theres a new bar that you sit in a Jacuzzi and they bring you your drinks. Either you care to join me?" He flirted with Lex and Portia, "or maybe both of you?"

"Are you serious!?" Lana snapped. "I'm standing right here!"

"Yeah, I can see that Lana." Archer glared at her, "and I seem to recall you were the one who called for us to take a break."

"A break?" Lex blinked. "Who are you, Ross and Rachel from Friends?"

"No spoilers!" Ranger said. "I'm only up to season 3."

"I called for the break because you are obsessed with Veronica Dean." Lana snapped.

"Oh God. Not again. Shut up already!" The rest of the Figgis Agency all groaned at hearing this again.

"She kissed me!" Archer snapped.

"And yet as soon as the break starts when hit on the first whores you see!" Lana snapped back.

"Excuse me?" Portia stood up.

"Who are you calling a whore huge hands?" Lex glared at her.

"My hands are not that big." Lana said.

"Bitch my hand is made of metal and its still not as big as yours." She pointed out.

"Suck it." Cheryl mocked.

"Shut up," Lana glared at her.

"What do you from me Lana?" Archer asked.

"For starters, how about you try not being a giant asshole?" Lana glared at him. "Its not that hard."

"Phrasing." Pam said.

"Heyooh!" Cyril added.

"Ahem!" Rex got their attention. "We're gonna have to arrest you."

"Arrest us?" Archers eyes widened, "for what?"

"We're superheroes, we catch criminals." The Subtopian pointed out, "and you people are clearly criminals."

"Actually." Cyril stepped forward. "Thanks to two separate deals negotiated with the CIA, we've been granted immunity from all crimes that may have bin committed before hand."

"Yeah, that doesn't include crimes committed after you were black listed." Robobot pointed out.

"Dukes." Rays eyes widened.

"Couldn't you look the other way just once?" Mallory smiled. "For old times sake?"

"Old times?" Rex raised an eyebrow. "But we just met."

"WHAT!?" Mallory shouted. "I thought you were just playing coy, but you actually don't remember me?"

"Ah, should I?" Rex asked.

"Mallory Archer? San Francisco, forty years ago." Mallory said but Rex just raised an eyebrow. "Are f***ing joking? We invented the ariel bombardment!"

"The what?" Ranger asked.

"Its when you have sex with someone who can fly." Ray explained. "They fly you up into the air out of sight and you hold on tight while your doing it."

"How do you know that?" Lana asked.

"Because I've lived." Ray replied.

"Sploosh." Pam said.

"Wait a minute." Rex narrowed his eyes. "I did invent that move. But it was forty two years ago and was with an English woman in London. She was a loud one, surprised no one on the ground could hear her."

"Urgh," Lex covered her mouth so she wouldn't throw up.

"You son of a BITCH!" Mallory snapped. "Do you know how long it took for that titanium hand print to finally fade? It was great fun trying to explaining to my dates why I had a hand shaped birth mark on my ass!"

"Please stop." Archer begged.

"Yeah well," Rex tried to think of an excuse.

"Hes your Dad!" Pam suddenly spoke up.

"Wait what?" Archer gasped.

"He could be your Dad." Pam said. "How cool would it be to have a superhero for a Dad?"

"If he is your Dad, then this apple fell so far from the tree it fell off a mountain." Cyril quipped.

"Wait!" Lexs eyes widened. "You mean this asshole could be my brother? Okay, now I really am gonna throw up."

"Everybody shut up." Archer snapped. "Hes not my Dad! I mean, Mother?"

"No hes not your father you ass!" His mother snapped at him. "This was years before you were even born." She faced Rex, "you just missed out on what would have bin the best night of your life again.

"Couldn't be that good if I don't remember you." Rex shrugged.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Mallory screamed as she charged at Rex who grabbed her wrists to hold her back.

"God damn it!" Rex said. "Robobot, a little help here!"

"HUMANITY FOREVER!" Archer screamed as he ran at Robobot, who threw his fist up into Archers face.

With that the Figgis Agency attacked the League of Freedom, except for one.

"Shoo! Shoo! Shoooo! Shoooom!" Krieger did his bizarre moves away from the fight.

"Alright you crazy bitch." Saturn took out his blow dart gun. "Lets see how you handle 1,500 cc's of Saturn Serum." He shot a dart, but it flew past Cheryl and hit Pam, who had jumped onto Brads back.

"Ow!" Pam pulled the dart out of her neck.

"Oh do me!" Cheryl clapped her hands. "Do me! Do me! Do me!"

"Gladly!" Black Saturn shot another dart, but he missed again and hit Pam.

"Ow!" He shot her again, "Damn it!" Hit her again, "Son of bitch!"

"Whose been f***ing with my blow gun!?" Saturn snapped before throwing it to the ground. "Fine! What have you got?"

Cheryl pulled out two knitting needles. "Just these two sharp tungsten needles!" She cackled madly as she ran after Saturn who ran away screaming.

Cyril was running away when he tripped, but found Archers gun on the ground. "Show some dignity man." American Ranger approached him.

Cyril got to his feet and fired. "SURPESSING FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRREEE!" When he ran out of bullets he opened his eyes to see Ranger was completely fine as every shot had missed.

Ranger looked himself over in surprise before facing Cyril. "You know when firing a gun," he punched Cyril in the face and knocked him to the ground, "it helps to keep your eyes open."

Ray stood before Portia. "Easy," he held his hands up defensively. "I am not stupid enough to pick a fight with superheroes. Big fan of your show by the way."

"Thank you." Portia smiled as they both turned to watch everyone else fight. "This escalated quickly."

"I wish I could say this wasn't normal for us." Ray sighed. "I really do."

"That's unnerving." Portia said, "but not as much as that."

"Shoo! Shoo! Shoooo! Shoooom!" Krieger passed them.

"Yeah we really need to do something about him." Ray sighed.

"I know a couple of good therapis-GAH!" She was cut off when Krieger karate chopped her face.

"Oh sorry!" He said. Portia didn't respond, instead she put on her bracelet and became Zenith. "Uh oh." He turned and tried to run away, but Zenith fired a beam from her staff that caught him and she then threw him across the yard where he fall on one of the tables and broke it.

Lex was grappling with Lana. "Jesus your hands are huge."

"They are not that big!" Lana snapped. They broke away and Lana tried to roundhouse kick her in the head. But Lex caught her foot, "oh shit."

"By the way," Lex flew up off the ground and spun around before throwing Lana across the yard where she crashed into Cyril. "The hooker boots are tacky."

"LANA!" Archer pushed himself up.

"Lana!" Mallory mocked as she kept trying to attack Rex. "Typical."

"Oh to hell with this." Rex snapped before pushing Mallory back and punching her in the face and knocking her to the ground.

"MOTHER!" Archer shouted.

"Dad, you just punched an old lady." Lex gasped.

"Yeah but your hes like super old two." Cheryl said as she chased Saturn, "So it balances out." She was then hit in the face by a Saturn Ring. "Mmmm, that's the stuff."

"AAAAHHHH!" Archer charged at Rex with his fist pulled back. The subtopian raised his titanium hand to block the punch. "OW!" Archer shook his pained hand. Rex punched him across the face, then in the gut before upper cutting him with his titanium hand. Archer flew across the yard and hit the ground next to where Pam and Brad were fighting.

"Damn," Pam blinked. "That looked like it hurt." Brad reached up, grabbed her and threw her into Cheryl.

Cooch leapt at Ray he dodged each of her pounces. "Damn dude, how'd you move that fast?"

"I have bionic legs." Ray said simply, he was then sucker punched by Black Saturn.

"HA!" He laughed, "what else you got!"

Ray glared at him. "I also have a bionic hand!" With that he punched Saturn threw the air and crashed into the windshield of Archers car.

"MY CAR!" Archer shouted.

"Great," Mallory rolled her eyes, "now you can spend even more money fixing it."

"THAT'S IT!" Archer got to his feet and ran at Rex before jumping to kick him. Rex side stepped the kick and swung his titanium fist upwards. Archers eyes widened as the metal fist collided with his groin. He fell to the ground holding his crotch while gasping for air.

"You all done yet?" The subtopian asked.

"Yeah," Lana picked herself up. "I think we're done."

"By the way," Ray spoke up, "you might wanna sterilise your metal hand."

Later at the Figgis Agency

"Well," Mallory poured herself a drink. "That was a new kind of disaster."

"Super Disaster!" Cheryl sniffed some glue.

"Speaking of which," Pam spoke up, "why aren't we in jail? I mean we were arrested by superheroes."

"Lets just say I knew a secret a certain senator didn't want revealed to his wife." Mallory explained.

"Was the secret that you slept with him?" Lana asked.

"Shut up." Mallory glared at her.

"But I think we can all agree this, like pretty much everything, is Archers fault." Ray said.

"How was that my fault?" Archer asked sitting in a chair with a bag of ice on his crotch."

"This never would have happened if you hadn't tried to join that ridicules group of freaks in the first place." Mallory snapped. "Just look what they did to us."

"Yeah I don't know what kind of energy she hit me with," Krieger spoke up, "but I still have an erection."

"Eww," every moved away from him.

"Well lets just look at the silver lining." Cyril said.

Mallory raised an eyebrow, "which is?"

"Archer getting punched in the groin by a big metal fist." Cyril chuckled.

"Cyril you-OW!" Archer tried to get up but was struck with pain. "Damn it. Look this is Slater's fault. This never would have happened if he never sent that email. I hope that dick is captured by a terrorist group right now."

CIA Headquarters

"Happy Birthday Dear Slater!" A room full of agents with party hats on sang as Slater himself stood before the birthday cake. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!" Slater blew out the candles and everyone cheered.

"Thanks everybody." He smiled.

"Oh its just getting started." Hawley blew a party blower. "We have a very special guest here just for you."

"Who?" Slater asked as the door opened and his eyes widened, "Titanium Rex!"

"That's right," the Subtopian smiled. "I wanted to come by to wish you a happy birthday and personally thank you for your email warning me about those assholes."

"My pleasure. But you probably would have figured out what he f*** ups they are." Slater said.

"Yeah, I was getting a pretty clear picture of it." Rex nodded. "Anyway, I wouldn't be a very good guest if I didn't bring a present." He held up a flash drive and handed it to Hawley. "Could you put it up on the big screen?"

Moments later everyone was laughing was they watched footage of The League Freedom beat the crap out of the Figgis Agency.

"Ranger was right in front of him." Rex took a bite of birthday cake. "How the hell did he miss?"

"No idea." Haley shook his head.

"Oh heres the best part!" Slater said as Rex punched Archer in the groin, making him fall to the ground and gasp for air.

"I took the blond guys advice and sterilised my titanium hand." Rex said.

"Best birthday present ever." Slater smiled.

 **(HERO DENIED)**

 **How crazy have the last couple of Seasons of Archer been? Hope you all enjoyed the chapter.**


	9. Baymax (Big Hero 6)

**Howdy folks! This chapter was a lot of fun to write and I know your all going to enjoy it.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Supermansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.**

 **Supermansion Unlimited**

"Damn it where the hell is this guy!?" Rex snapped as he and the rest of the League sat outside waiting for the latest candidate trying out for the team.

"What up my ninjas?" Courtney walked into the yard.

"What are you doing here?" Ranger asked before his eyes widened. "Dear God please tell me your not the applicant?"

"Nah," Courtney shook his head. "Saturn called me over so we could hang out when you guys are done with the interview thing."

"If this guy ever actually shows up." Saturn said in annoyance.

"I don't get it." Cooch looked around. "Quesadilla King should be here by now."

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "Did you say Quesadilla King?"

"Yeah," Cooch held up a piece of green paper, "his resume says hes fast and his quesadillas are the best in Storm City."

"Cooch, can I see that?" Portia asked and the cat passed it over. "Cooch this isn't a resume, it's a flyer for a Mexican restaurant."

"Oh for f*** shake!" Rex snapped grabbing the flyer. "We wasted the day when we could have bin interviewing an actual hero."

"This is why Cooch shouldn't have been allowed to accept an applicant without someone checking her work." Robobot pointed out.

"So, does this mean we go to him?" Cooch asked. The crumpled up flyer hit her in the head. "Hey!"

"Lets all look at the bright side," Ranger smiled before looking around, "at least Courtney left."

"Hey guys!" Courtney walked back in, "I'm back!"

Ranger frowned, "never mind."

"Check this out!" He held up a strange looking red box.

"What is it?" Lex asked.

"Don't know," Courtney shrugged before putting it down. "I found outside next to a suitcase."

"It sounds like you just stole someones luggage." Robobot concluded.

"Whoops," Courtney scratched the back of his head. "Think there could be sodas in there?" A small rock then hit him in the head. "OW!" Courtney cried placing a hand against his forehead.

"Ranger!" Portia snapped.

"No regrets," he stated.

As they argued, the white ring on the box lit up with a beep. It then opened up and what appeared to be a balloon man inflated, getting everyones attention. He blinked before stepping out of the case and walked over to them. "Hello," he raised his hand. "I am Baymax, your personal health care companion."

"Okay," Rex blinked.

"I was alerted to the need for medical attention when you said, ow." Baymax explained. A projection of ten faces with varying expressions. "On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your pain?"

"Me?" Courtney blinked. "Well this has gotta be like a seven or an eight."

"Dear lord." Ranger face palmed.

"I will scan you now." He did and a image of a head appeared on his chest. "You have a minor bruise on your forehead." The area glowed red. "Cooling the area will ease pain and reduce swelling." Baymax placed a hand on Courteys forehead and it glowed blue.

"Oh," he smiled, "that feels good."

"You are a robot, like me." Robobot stood up and walked around the table. He poked Baymax's belly, "vinyl?"

"I was designed to be non threatening and huggable." Baymax explained.

"You kinda look like a giant marshmallow." Lex observed. "So mission accomplished."

"Whats else has he got?" Brad asked.

Robobot scanned Baymax. "Hyper spectral cameras. Carbon fibre actuators, lightweight yet very strong. Impressive."

"How strong?" Rex asked.

"According to my readings, he can lift 1,000 pounds." Robobot explained.

Ranger whistled, "not bad."

"Not to mention a super capacitor power source." Robobot went on. "Your design is highly- Cooch what are you doing?"

The cat had left her seat and was now pressing her face against Baymaxs back. "Hey guys! Theses some cool stuff in here." Before she could go on, her claws punctured Baymaxs arm causing it to deflate. "Whoops."

"There is no need for alarm," Baymax assured her. "I will simply, re-inflate." He arm blew back up, but air poured out of the holes.

"Robot farts." Courtney and Black Saturn chuckled causing Ranger to shake his head.

Baymax took a piece of tape and covered one of the leaks, Portia pushed the tape dispenser closer to him. Soon he was taped up and no longer leaking air. "Tell us more Baymax."

"I am programmed with over ten thousand medical procedures. My hands are equipped with defibrillators," he rubbed them together showed they charged with electricity. I am also equipped with a scanner that is capable of X-rays to detect bone fractures. Anti-bacterial spray, heating system, cooling system and a fire extinguisher."

"Interesting," Saturn put a hand under his chin. "But tell me can you," he drew a Saturn ring. "Think fast!" He threw the ring at Baymax, but it bounced off his inflated body and hit Saturn in the face. "AAAHHHH!" He screamed while clutching his nose.

"Jesus Saturn, again?" Rex said in annoyance. "Its like a running gag at this point."

"Still funny though." Cooch laughed.

Baymax approached him. "On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your pain."

"F*** YOU!" Saturn snapped.

"I will scan you now." Baymax scanned him. "Your nose is not broken, however it will swell from the impact. I also detect you have been using proactive to combat your acne."

"What!? I don't have acne." He protested.

"Its because you never take your mask off Saturn, its not a big secret." Robobot pointed out.

"I recommend switching to a stronger treatment." Baymax said. "Perhaps, Isotretinion."

"Gross," Cooch cringed.

"That cooling system you mentioned was what you used on Courtney, correct?" Portia asked and the robot nodded. "Whats the heating system do?" Baymax blinked before walking over and laying down over her. "Uh," his body began to glow as it generated heat. "Oh, that's actually nice."

"My scans show that you are in excellent health." Baymax said as he separated from her.

"Well thank you Baymax." Portia smiled.

"Do Rex next." Cooch said.

"I will scan you now." The robot announced.

"Don't scan me." Rex said.

"Scan complete." A question mark appeared on his chest. "Your scans do not match human DNA."

"That's cause I'm not human." Rex explained. "I'm Subtopian."

"I apologise." The question mark disappeared. "But I cannot give a proper diagnosis without detailed information of Subtopian health."

"That's alright." Rex said.

"Although," Baymax raised a finger. "My scans did detect that you have an enlarged prostate. Very common among the elderly." Everyone snickered at this, except for Lex who was grossed out. "I also detect traces of Sildenafil Citrate," Baymax went on. "Otherwise known as Viagra or the boner pill."

"Can we change the subject?" Lex spoke up. "Please!"

"Impressive as your medical knowledge is Baymax, all members of the League need to be able to fight as well." Rex explained.

"My capabilities are greatly increased when I enter battle mode." Baymax said.

"Battle mode you say?" Ranger crossed his arms. "Lets see it."

"Very well." A beep was heard and moments later something flew out of the sky towards them.

"INCOMING!" Ranger shouted.

"No need for alarm." Baymax assured them. "It is simply, Skymax."

Before anyone could ask, the object slowed down before landing revealing its self to be a red rocket like robot. Its chest opened up and out of it flew red pieces of armor that quickly attached to Baymax. No one noticed it leave as they looked with wide eyes at Baymax in his Super Armor.

"Okay," Brad said with wide eyes. "That is awesome."

"Whoa," Courtney walked around the now armored robot. "You know what this armor needs? Some sweet flames!"

The heroes rolled their eyes, except for Black Saturn. "That sounds awesome!"

"We could put em here, here and here. Maybe a-OW!" Courtney yelled when another rock hit him in the head."

"Damn it Ranger!" Portia snapped.

"Somebody had to it." He defended.

"On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your pain?" Baymax asked.

"I'm sure hes fine." Rex waved it off. "Now tell us what this armor can do."

"In addition to greatly increasing my physical strength, this armor is equipped with thrusters for flight." Baymax explained. "I am told this is my 'coolest' function." He raised his fist at a statue and it fired like a rocket, demolishing the statue before reattaching to his arm.

"ROCKET FISTS!" Saturn and Courtney yelled in excitement.

"That was awesome!" Cooch cheered.

"Now that would do some real damage in fight." Rex smiled. "I can practically see the look on villains faces when they see a rocket fist coming straight at them."

"That is not possible." Baymax spoke up as his access port opened, revealing the chips and pointed to the green one. "My programming prevents me from injuring a human being."

"That could be a problem in a fight." Brad said.

"Not as much as you think," Lex pointed out. "I mean some of the things we fight aren't actually human."

"I got this guys." Saturn grabbed the healthcare chip and removed it before tossing it behind him. "Problem solved." The remaining chips took hold as Baymaxs eyes turned red. "Now than, the most important part of combat is the element of SURPRISE!" He threw a Saturn ring that hit Baymax in the head. He turned and his targeting system locked onto Saturn before backhanding him across the lawn.

"Dude are you okay?" Courtney called out to him. "That was one hell of a bitch slap."

Saturn got up in time to see Baymax raise his arm and launch his rocket fist. "Holy shit!" Saturn turned and ran away as the fist closed in before jumping out of the way. But his cape got caught on it as it rocketed past and began dragging him across the ground. "OW! SHIT! OW! F***!" Saturn shouted in pain as he was dragged around the ground and then back to Baymax as the fist reattached to Baymaxs arm. "Time out," Saturn groaned painfully as the robot raised his fist to strike.

"ENOUGH!" Rex flew out of his seat and slammed into Baymaxs chest, forcing him to drop Saturn and stumble backwards. "Stand down!" Baymax activated his wings and thrusters before flying at Rex, tackling him and flying into the sky.

"I did not see this coming." Ranger said as the Subtopian and robot crashed into the ground before separating. Baymax launched his rocket fist at Rex who stood his ground and pulled back his titanium fist. When it was close enough Rex punched the fist, knocking it off course, forcing the rest of the League to jump away from the table to avoid it.

"Little heads up would be nice." Robobot said as he recovered the healthcare chip.

The Rocket fist returned to Baymax who target Rex. "I GOT YOUR BACK REX!" Courtney ran up behind Baymax and hit him with a chair, but it had no effect. Baymax turned its red eyes on Courtney. "Oh shit!" He ran away screaming and Baymax gave chase.

"Son of a bitch." Portia took the Jewell off her necklace and it became a bracelet. "Here we go." She placed it on her wrist and magical armor appeared upon her and she became Zenith. The Goddess summoned her staff of power and flew into the fray.

Courtney screamed as he ran into a dead end at the mansion wall. He turned around to see Baymax raise his fist before launching it at him. "AAAAHHHHHH!" Courtney screamed for several seconds before noticing the rocket fist was glowing and held in place by a beam from Zeniths staff.

"Run boy man!" Zenith ordered and Courtney ran. Zenith swung her staff around, bringing the fist with it, slamming it into Baymax.

"If we reinsert the healthcare chip, he will stop attacking." Robobot explained.

"Alright League! Regroup and attack!" Rex ordered and everyone moved in.

As Baymax reattached his fist, Ranger and Robobot struck him from behind. He turned around but Lex flew in, shoulder tackling him and made him stumble back. Zenith flew in from behind and swung her staff while Rex flew in from the front and punched with his titanium fist. The Goddess took Baymaxs legs out from under him while the Subtopian punched him in the face, the combined attacks caused the robot to flip in the air and fall to the ground. Baymax tried to get up but Brad grabbed him from behind and Cooch jumped onto the robot to try and reinsert the chip.

"Whats the hold up?" Ranger asked.

"It won't fit." Cooch kept trying.

"You're putting it in backwards!" Robobot pointed out.

"Oh," Cooch blinked before turning it around and shoved it in.

Baymaxs eyes stopped glowing. "My healthcare protocol has been violated." He looked at the League as the gathered around him. "I regret any distress I may have caused."

"Its not your fault Baymax." Robobot placed a hand on the other robots arm. "Its Saturns." They looked and saw that he was still unconscious.

"You fight well for a machine." Zenith said.

"Which raises question." Rex realised. "Who built you?"

"Baymax!" They all turned to see a teenager in indigo armor run in, "there you are." He hugged the robot. "I thought something happened to you."

"Hiro," Baymax placed a hand on his back. "I am undamaged."

A cough got the pairs attention. "I take it this is your robot?"

"Uh yeah." Hiro tried to keep his composer around the other heroes. "My names Hiro."

"You have built a very impressive robot." Robobot said.

"I didn't design Baymax actually," Hiro lost his smile. "My brother Tadashi did."

Lex recognised the sadness in his voice. "I'm sorry for your loss."

"Tadashi is here." Baymax said before remove his chest armor and played a recording on his chest.

 _"Oh man, wait till my brother sees you." Tadasgi smiled. "Your gonna help so many people buddy, so many. That's all for now, I am satisfied with my care."_

Hiro gave a small smile as the recording ended.

"You honor your brother by carrying on his wish to help others." Zenith smiled. "You possess great wisdom for one so young."

"Is it over?" Courtney asked while hiding behind Zenith.

"Yes Courtney," Ranger shook his head. "Its over."

"Cool. You see how I hit him with that chair Rex?" The Subtopian rolled his eyes. "So," he held out his fist to Baymax, "we good."

The robot blinked before fist bumping him. "Balalala," he wiggled his fingers.

"I taught him that." Hiro said.

"I'm guessing you also created his armor." Rex surmised. "Very impressive features."

"The only feature not demonstrated, is Overdrive mode." Baymax pointed out.

"Overdrive mode huh?" Rex raised an eyebrow. "Okay, lets see it."

Hiro thought about it for a moment, but figured it was okay to show fellow superheroes. "Okay, brace yourselves. Baymax, Overdrive Mode!"

"Entering Overdrive Mode." Baymaxs armor began to shift and he became larger with glowing turbines on his body. The wings flew off his back before coming together to become a sword which he caught. "Overdrive Mode Engaged."

"Whoa!" Brad said with wide eyes.

Energy coursed from Baymaxs body to his sword and he swung it downwards, the blast of light and explosion could be seen from anywhere in Storm City.

"O. M. GOD!" Lex said as the dust cleared. "That was amazing!"

"Sorry about the car." Hiro scratched the back of his head at the sight of Black Saturns car which had been completely destroyed. Saturn raised his head for a moment and saw what remained of his car, then fell down again.

"Don't worry about it." Rex assured him. "Happens all the time."

Baymaxs armor returned to normal. "I did the thing." He said in a slurred voice.

"You okay dude?" Cooch asked.

"Hairy baby," Baymax slured as he petted Cooch.

"He sounds drunk." The Brad said. "Wait can robots get drunk?"

"No." Robobot shook his head. "If they could I'd be going through three kegs a day."

"His batteries running low." Hiro explained before leading him back to the box to recharge. "Overdrive Mode really drains the power."

"Clearly this 'Overdrive Mode' is a last resort." Robobot summarised.

"A mighty power indeed." Zenith smiled before her body shined with light and Portia returned. She spotted the remains of the car. "Ah, what did I miss?"

"Just Saturn's car getting trashed." Lex said.

"Okay guys we gotta let this guy on the team." Courtney said in excitement. "Rocket fists!"

"I never thought I'd say this, and I mean really couldn't imagine any possible scenario that would ever make me say these words, but I agree with Courtney." Robobot said. "Baymax would be an excellent addition to the League, both as a hero and the teams doctor. Also no longer having to handle everyones physicals will be a huge relief."

Courtney looked at him. "Huh, I figured you'd be jelly."

"What do you mean?" The robot asked.

"Well hes like a robot nurse and hes got thrusters and rocket fists." Courtney Pointed out. "You were built to be like a 3 Billion dollar war machine, but you ain't got shit nearly that cool."

Robobot glared at him. "How observant of you."

"There we go." Hiro said as Baymax, now fully charged, stepped out.

"Well Hiro, I think theres room on the team for both of you." Rex smiled.

"Thanks for the offer." Hiro smiled before climbing onto Baymaxs back. "But we're already part of a team. Big Hero 6. Baymax wings!" The robots wings appeared and he lifted off the ground as the thrusters in his feet activated.

Baymax raised his hand. "Goodbye." This that they blasted off into the air.

"Maybe we'll meet that team someday." Rex said as they watched them fly away.

"Yeah," Courtney nodded before smirking. "I totally could have taken him back there." A rock hit him in the head. "OW!"

"God Damn it Ranger!" Portia snapped.

Ranger held his hands up. "It wasn't me this time."

"Then who was it?" Courtney asked holding his forehead.

Robobot discreetly tossed a rock behind him. "We may never know."

 **(HERO APPROAVED)**

 **The Baymax in this chapter focuses on the one the Movie version. For those of you wondering why all of Big Hero 6 didn't show up, I wanted Baymax to be centre focus. Anyway, Baymax is won't be joining the League of Freedom as hes already part of a team of superheroes. But he might just show up later in the story.**

 **Oh yeah, be sure to check out the next chapter of my story "Replace and Amaze" the next movie will be Deadpool 2.**


	10. Megamind and Minion (Megamind)

**Merry Christmas everyone! This story has been long overdue for and update. This chapter contains aspects from both the movie and the video game.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Supermansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.**

 **Supermansion Unlimited**

"I swear if this applicant is late I'm just closing for the day." Rex said as he and the League waited.

"How long do they have left?" Lex asked.

"They still have sixty seconds before their scheduled time." Robobot pointed out.

"I have a question." Ranger spoke up. "Why is he here?" He pointed to Courtney who was sitting on a lawn chair drinking a soda.

"Had plans to hang with my friends but Portia wouldn't let me." Courtney pouted.

"I told you not to hang around that junior high." Portia said. "Its weird."

"I told you they get me." Courtney said.

Suddenly a large cloud of smoke poured into the yard. "What the hell?" Rex asked before using his titan vision, "someones here."

Suddenly 'Highway To Hell' started playing, red and blue lasers shined through the smoke. "Aw sweet lasers!" Courtney smiled.

The blue lasers formed a shape, then there was a burst of flame and when it passed, Megamind stepped through followed by Minion who carried a boom box. "And that," he stood before the League, "is how you make an entrance!" He signalled Minion to cut the music. He pressed a button, but 'Lovin You' started playing. Minion rapidly pressed buttons trying to shut it off but just kept switching between songs until he struck it with his fist to shut it off.

"Allow me to introduce myself, I am Megamind!" He smiled, "and this is my sidekick Minion."

"Hi," he waved.

"Welcome both of you." Portia smiled.

"Thank you, and thank you Miss Jones for A Talk in the Clouds." Megamind returned the smile.

"Big fans," Minion added.

"Lets stay on topic." Rex cut in. "I'll be blunt with you, I wasn't exactly thrilled at the idea of a super villain trying out of this team."

"Former super villain." Megamind corrected. "As I once told the prison warden, I'm a changed man. Only this time I mean it."

"How about you start from the beginning?" Robobot suggested.

"I had a fairly standard childhood." Megamind began. "I came from what you might call a broken home."

"Divorce?" Portia asked.

"No I mean literally broken, the planet was collapsing as it was sucked into a black hole." He clarified.

"Oh that's much worse." Robobot said.

Megamind continued. "My parents gave me Minion here and launched off to safety in rocket. I landed in the Metrosity Prison for the Criminally Gifted. There, the inmates raised me and taught me right from wrong."

"That would explain why you grew up to be a super villain." Brad observed.

"Wait," Lex checked the resume. "I says here you're from Metro City."

"That's what I said, Metrosity." The League looked at each other, then to Minion who just shrugged. "Over the years I had many battles with my arch nemesis, Metro Man. He would win some, I would almost win others. Until one day I finally won and Metrocity was mine. It was a blast, at first." Megamind sighed. "But soon I felt empty, purposeless, a yin without a yang."

"You lost your wang?" Cooch gasped.

"What? No!" Megamind shook his head. "I was a villain with out a hero and I honestly had no idea what to do, but then I was inspired. Heroes aren't born, they're made. So I made one."

"You," Rex raised an eyebrow, "made a hero?"

"With bits of dandruff on Metro Mans cape, I extracted the source of his awesome power." Megamind explained. "I planned to give them to a noble man, train him to become Metrositys new protector and everything would return to normal."

"How'd that work out?" Lex asked.

"Not great." Minion shook his head.

"Yeah turns out just cause someone has no criminal record, doesn't mean they won't turn to crime." Megamind scratched the back of his head. "Instead of being a hero, Tighten chose to become a villain and tried to kill me. Can you believe that? I barely escaped with my life and he took over Metrosity."

"I heard about that." Black Saturn spoke up. "Guy used his heat vision to write his name across the whole city. Pretty badass."

"Well I think we've heard enough." Rex stood up, "thanks for coming by."

"Dad!" Lex snapped. "Let him finish." Her father sighed but sat back down. "Go on."

"I hit a low point, actually turned myself into jail. But then Tighten kidnapped Roxanne Richi and demanded that I come face him. Thankfully, I had someone to make me stop feeling sorry for myself." Megamind smiled at Minion who smiled back. "So I geared up and concocted a plan to stop Tighten."

"So in the end you owned up to your responsibility and tried to fix your mistake." Portia summarised.

"Righting your own wrongs, more people should try that." Lex looked at her father.

"And just what wrongs would you be referring to?" Rex narrowed his eyes at her.

"Well, theres sleeping with Rangers wife for sixty years. Sleeping with Dr Devizos wife thus turning him evil." Robobot counted off. "Also Frank Flavas wife which drove him to seek revenge."

"Oh don't forget about the whole being a traitor to both Earth and Subtopia thing." Courtney spoke up.

"OKAY! OKAY! I GET IT!" Rex shouted before taking a breath. "A situation where Courtney makes sense is a bad one." He sighed, "I'm sorry Megamind, please continue."

"The plan went a little bit South, but in the end I defeated Tighten using the very same device that gave him his powers to take them away again." Megamind said proudly. "Then I said, you know the thing about bad guys? They always lose!"

"Not Bad." Brad smiled.

"When the battle was over the same people who once shunned and feared me, cheered my name." Megamind smiled as he remembered that day. "I was then made the new hero of Metrosity and I've kept it safe ever since."

"An impressive story of personal growth." Robobot observed.

"So do you have powers?" Ranger asked.

"Well this giant blue head isn't just for show." Megamind said. "I am genius inventor. Behold," he gestures to the watch on his wrist. "A simple yet very stylish wrist watch, or is it? I need a volunteer."

"Oh right here!" Courtney ran up to him before anyone could object.

"Perfect." Megamind placed the watch on Courtney's wrist. "Okay Rex, say something."

"Like what?" Rex asked and a blue light scanned him. Moments later Courtney was replaced with another Rex.

"Holy crap! I'm Titanium Rex!" Courtney gasped. "I even sound like him."

"Ta da!" Megamind held out his arms. "The Holo-Watch."

"Impressive holographic technology." Robobot said.

"Thank you my good Rababot." Megamind smiled.

"Its Robobot," the robot corrected.

"That's that I said." Megamind replied.

"THIS IS AWESOME!" Courtney cheered. "Hey Portia check this out!" He ran over to a statue. "Super Strength Activate!" He punched the statue only to cry out in pain and clutch his hand.

"Ah, it only mimics appearance and voice." Megamind pointed out. "Not powers." He took the watch and Courtney looked like himself again. "But," he but it on and scanned American Ranger before turning into him, "it still creates the perfect disguise."

"Is my chin really that big?" Ranger asked.

"Yes it is." Robobot nodded.

"Hey two Rangers." Cooch spoke up. "This is just like that dream you had last week Portia."

"What?" Portia's eyes widened. "I never told you about that."

"I'm a cat," she pointed to her ears. "I could hear you talking to yourself."

"Can I get some ice?" Courtney held his hand. "Wait, what dream?"

"Nothing!" Portia said quickly before glaring at the others. "Nothing at all! Right?"

"Of course Portia," Rex chuckled. "So what other inventions have you made?"

"I'm glad you asked." Megamind smiled. "Minion, the Knock-Out-Spray!"

Minion took out a bottle and sprayed Courtney in the face. "Hey! Wha-" he was cut off when he fell to the ground.

"Forget-Me-Spray, compact and fast acting." Minion added.

"Not bad, but you made one mistake." Saturn jumped to his feet. "You messed with the sidekick of Black Saturn!" He threw a Saturn ring but it flew between Megamind and Minion. The later tried to spray him but found the bottle was empty.

"Uh oh," he dropped the can. "Time for the Forget-Me-Stick."

"Ha!" Saturn laughed. "My minds like a steel trap. I don't forge-" he was then hit in the head and knocked out.

"The Forget-Me-Stick," Megamind smiled. "Simple yet effective."

"Clearly," Robobot observed.

"I also created Minions robotic body." Minion struck a few poses. "Its effective," his arm extended grabbing a statue and pulled it over. "Powerful," he held the statue over his head with one arm before breaking it in two, "and environmentally friendly." Minion gave a thumbs up.

"That is pretty cool." Lex smiled.

"Now behold my signature weapon, the De-Gun!" He held it up for them to see.

"Whats it do?" Cooch asked.

"Oh it does a lot my feline friend." Megamind began by turning the ring. "It has several different settings. Decompress, Debilitate, Demoralize, Decoupage, Deregulate, Death Ray, Destroy," he noticed Black Saturn waking up, "and my personal favourite, Dehydrate!" He blasted Saturn turning him into a small blue glowing cube.

"Dear lord!" Ranger gasped.

"Remain calm everyone." Megamind grabbed a glass of water from the table. "The Dehydration process is painless and perfectly safe. All he needs is a little water." He poured it on the cube and in a blue light it was Black Saturn again.

"What just happened!?" He gasped and looked around.

"Gotta admit, that is impressive." Rex said.

"So was it weird fighting other villains after you became a hero?" Lex asked.

"Oh big time." Megamind rolled his eyes. "I mean you try and keep things professional, but I was in a bowling league with these guys."

"Hey we should try bowling some time." Brad said.

"And I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little bit hurt they formed this Doom Syndicate and didn't invite me to join." Megamind said.

"Ah sir, they didn't form that group until after you became a good guy." Minion pointed out.

"I know, but it's the thought that counts." Megamind replied. "Anyway one by one I brought Syco Delic, Destruction Worker, Hot Flash, Judge Sludge and the Conductor to justice."

"Not the worst names I've ever heard." Robobot observed.

"I gotta say Megamind, you've really turned your life around." Portia smiled.

"More than you know." Megamind began. "When I became defender of Metrosity, I sold all my evil inventions and created a super suit and a whole new look for myself. Thankfully I look good in white." He smiled. "But an old weapon of mine was activated, The Mega Megamind!"

"Lame." Saturn got to his feet.

"I had transferred my evil personality into an giant rabot! It had a rocket fist on one arm and a built in crossbow that could fire cars on the other." Megamind explained. "Man I do good work."

"Okay, those do sound pretty awesome" Saturn admitted.

"Because of my new look, it thought I was Metro Man. It was the perfect time to debut my super suit." Megamind then looked away. "Unfortunately it turned out to be lot harder than I thought and the super suit didn't really work out."

"He got stepped on." Minion clarified.

"Thank you, Minion." He glared at him. "Anyway since fighting like Metro Man didn't work, it was time to fight like me. With my Spider Bot, I lured the Mega Megamind to the old observatory where Minion used the Death Ray in space to destroy it!"

"You've got a Death Ray in space?" Rex gasped.

"A solar powered Death Ray." Minion added.

"When I destroyed it, I could finally say goodbye to the old evil me and truly embrace my new role as a hero." Megamind said proudly.

"That's a very impressive story." Portia smiled.

"Could you build a taco launcher?" Cooch asked.

"Ah sure, probably." Megamind shrugged.

The cat stood up. "I vote we let him in!"

"Hold on Cooch, the interviews not over yet." Rex said. "Tell me more about your inventions?"

"With pleasure." Megamind gave Minion and look, he nodded and ran out of the yard. "Now you probably wondering, since I don't fly, how do I patrol Metrosity?"

"Actually I was wondering when Courtney would be waking up?" Portia asked looking at her boyfriend laying on the grass out cold.

"Hopefully not anytime soon." Ranger quipped.

"Behold," Megamind held his arms out, "the invisible car!"

Cooch raised an eyebrow, "I don't see anything."

"Precisely! Its completely hidden from-" he reached out but couldn't find anything, "the human eye."

"I'm a cat," she pointed out.

"I call bullshit!" Saturn walked over. "Theres so such thing as a OW!" He bumped into something.

"Sorry!" An invisible window was rolled down to reveal Minion in the driver seat. "Forgot where we parked."

"If you think that's impressive, just wait till you see whats inside." Megamind whistled. Suddenly the doors opened and dozens of flying robots flew out of the car. "Allow me to introduce to you, my Brainbots!"

"Cool." Cooch smiled.

"Not only did they assist me battling Tighten, they were a big help in repairing the city afterwards." Megamind explained. "See for yourself," the Brainbots flew over to Saturn's car, grabbing it and together they lifted it off the ground and through the air.

"Good teamwork." Lex observed.

"Hey!" Saturn snapped. "Hands off my car!" He threw a saturn ring that hit one Brainbot and proceeded to bounce off all the others, casing them to drop the car.

Courtney began to wake up. "Aw man, what happened?" Saturn's car then hit the ground behind him, front first. "AAAAHHHHHHHH!" He screamed in fear before jumping to his feet and running behind Portia.

"You're gonna pay for that!" Saturn threw multiple Saturn rings. Megamind donned a metal glove that fired a burst of air that knocked the rings to the ground. "What the hell?"

"Another of my inventions," Megamind smirked. "The Blower Glove."

"Hehehe, blower." Courtney snickered.

Saturn laughed as well but composed himself. "Lets see how well you blow with my foot in your balls!"

"Seriously do you hear yourself when you talk?" Robobot asked.

Saturn ran at Megamind but before he could attack, the former villain raised a different glove that electrocuted Saturn. He twitched violently for a few seconds before falling to the ground. "The Telsa glove." Megamind announced. "Perfect for shocking enemies, powering up devices and… Minion bread." The fish took a loaf of bread from the invisible car and handed him a slice which Megamind electrified. "It makes excellent toast," he took a bite.

"I gotta admit, these are some impressive inventions." Rex said before trying a piece of toast, "and some damn good toast." The rest of the League tired some.

"Toast aside, your technological genius would be a welcome addition to the team." Robobot said. "It would be nice to have another intellectual to talk to."

"Whats that supposed to mean?" Ranger asked.

"Pretty sure the point was clear." the robot responded.

"Thank you Rababot, but when its time for some real heavy duty battle, I have this!" Megamind gestured to something covered by a giant tarp.

"Was that always there?" Brad asked Cooch who just shrugged as she ate her toast.

"Behold!" The Brainbots pulled the tarp away, "the Battle Suit!"

"Whoa." Lex said with wide eyes.

"Impressive isn't it." Megamind said. "Show them what it can do Minion."

"Yes Sir!" The fish nodded and got into the suit. As he moved around the suit matched his movements.

"As you can see despite the battle suits size its quite fast an agile." Megamind explained as battle suit began jumping around the yard. "It also runs quite enough that you can sneak up on someone with super hearing, and of course," Minion picked up Saturn's car. "Incredible strength." With that Minion crushed the car into a ball before dropping it on the ground.

"MY CAR!" Black Saturn shouted.

"Come on Saturn, it was already busted." Brad pointed out before quietly adding. "I was going for blown up."

"Now I have to tell you, my duty to protect Metrocity comes first." Megamind clarified. "So if accepted into the League, we won't always be here in the mansion."

"Thought so." Rex nodded. "You're not the first League member to not move into the mansion full time. But it still worked out and I think it will now two."

Megaminds eyes winded, "you mean?"

"Megamind, Minion." Rex smiled. "Welcome to the League of Freedom."

"We did it." Minion said in surprise.

"We did it." Megaminds surprise turned to excitement. "WE DID IT!" The two of the actually jumped in joy. "This calls for a celebration. Minion, HIT IT!"

Minion had the suit reach behind a wall and pick up a giant boom box, he pressed a button and "Bad" by Michael Jackson played. Both Megamind and Minion began dancing to it as the League watched.

"See," Lex looked to her father, "I told you he was hero."

"You were right Lex." Rex admitted, while moving his head to the beat. "And hes definitely got moves."

"Pssh! You call those moves." Saturn stepped forward. "These are moves." He moved his arm and was then hit by the battle suits leg and sent flying into the bushes at the other side of the yard.

"Sorry!" Minion apologised.

 **So ends my final update of 2019. Its been one hell of a year. Its had good times and bad times. But now that 2019 is coming to an end and the new year begins, we all get a chance to try new things and maybe grow a little in the process.**

 **I'll see you all in 2020. Until then, I wish you all Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year.**


	11. Sir Daniel Fortesque (MediEvil)

**Hello everybody! I hope 2020 is treating you all well so far. I now present my very first chapter of this year. Quick heads up, this chapter has a special guest appearance by a previously accepted hero.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SuperMansion, any of its characters or any of the characters appearing in this story.**

 **SuperMansion Unlimited**

"For once we're not just waiting on the applicant." Ranger observed as all but the leader of the League were present.

"Where is Rex?" Black Saturn asked.

"Last night he left for a date with Madison Shepard." Robobot explained.

"Madison Shepard?" Portia raised an eyebrow. "The same Madison Shepard whose in charge of the Leagues funding?"

"Correct." Robobot nodded. "Hopefully nothing happened to make her overturn her decision about regarding our funding."

"Oh I wouldn't worry about that." Rex landed behind them with a cup of coffee in his hand.

"Morning Rex." Brad said. "How'd your date go?"

"Did you two bone?" Cooch asked.

"Cooch you've got to stop asking people that." Rex said before smirking. "But lets just say, I won't be forgetting Madison this time."

"Nice," Saturn smirked.

"I wish I could forget this." Lex sighed.

"I take it we're still on good terms to the head of Financial Approval for Government Spending?" Robobot asked.

"Oh yes, but its not called that anymore." Rex said. "Kid Victory pointed out the acronym was… inappropriate."

"F. A.-" Portias eyes widened. "Oh my."

"What?" Cooch asked. "Whats an acronym?"

"Doesn't matter." Rex said before taking a seat. "So, who have we got today?"

"I selected todays hero." Lex said proudly. "Sir Daniel Fortesque. Hes an actual knight from England."

"Really?" Portia was impressed. "He might be able to bring a little more culture to the team. I like the sound of that."

"Debatable." Ranger spoke up.

"Here he is no-" Lex paused as a skeleton with one eye and no jaw bone, wearing a armor walked into the yard.

Every stared at him and his just gave a small wave. "Hi," Cooch waved back.

"Does everybody else see the skeleton?" Brad asked.

"Robobot." Rex didn't take his eyes off him. "What the hell am I looking at?"

"Scanning. Interesting," the robot began. "It is a human skeleton, that appears to be animated by an unknown force."

"Its magic." Portia said and the others looked at her. "Hey you share bond with a Goddess you learn a few things."

"Wheres his jaw?" Brad asked.

"How the hell are we supposed to do this?" Black Saturn asked. "Charades?"

"Lucky for us, I'm an old pro." Ranger smiled as he stood in front of Dan. "Okay, now I don't know how you do it in England-"

"I have a better idea." Lex took out her phone and made a call. "Hey, we need some magical help. Think you can come down here? Thanks."

Moments later a portal opened and out jumped Star Butterfly with a big smile on her face. "Hey superhero friends!" She then noticed Dan standing there, and he waved. "AAAAHHHHHH!" She screamed before firing a magical blast which Dan and Ranger both jumped back to avoid.

"Star its okay!" Lex flew over to her. "This is Sir Daniel Fortesque. Hes here to try out for the League, just like you and Marco did."

"Oh," Stars eyes widened before smiling in embarrassment. "Heh, sorry about that."

"He can't talk since, you know, no jaw bone." Lex explained. "So, I was hoping maybe you could help us out with your magic."

Star twirled her wand in her hand, "you called the right princess." A beam of magic zapped Dan, his skull then grew five times bigger. "Whoops. Just a second."

"Rex, your not seriously considering this are you?" Ranger asked as he returned to the table. "Allowing an undead abomination onto the team?"

"First of all Ranger, you overuse the word abomination." Lex pointed out. "But I checked his resume, granted he left out the being undead part, but hes an actual legend back in England. He should at least get a chance."

"Okay this time I got it." Star zapped him again.

Lex stepped forward. "Sir Fortesque?"

"Call me Dan," the skeleton said.

"Told ya I got this!" Star smiled.

"Hey Star!" Marco poked his head through the portal. "Nachos are ready."

The princesses eyes winded. "Triangle food!" She ran at Marco who yelped as she tackled him through the portal which closed seconds later.

"Alright Dan, looks like you've got quite a few titles" Rex read the resume. "Captain of the Militia, Hero of Gallowmere, very impressive. Tell us about that."

"I was a story teller," Dan began. "I regaled the villagers and nobles of Gallowmere with tales of adventure and battle. King Peregrin was so impressed he made me the head of the Royal Battalion."

"For telling stories?" Ranger said in shock.

"It was an honorary position." Dan shrugged. "Life was good until Zarok returned."

Rex raised an eyebrow, "who?"

"He used to be the court magician," Dan explained. "But he was experimenting on dead bodies."

"Eww!" Cooch cringed.

"The king banished him but he swore revenge and came back with an army of demons. Gallowmere needed a hero, so the King had me lead the militia against Zaroks army." Dan left out the part where he was literally dragged out of his bed.

"I've bin reading the legend and its amazing." Lex smiled. "It all about how you led the charge, tearing through hordes of demons and facing Zarok himself. Though mortally wounded, you slayed Zarok and saved the kingdom."

"Actually, that story is a lie." Dan said.

"Come again?" Rex asked.

"The truth is, I did lead the Militia against Zarok but," the skeleton sighed. "I was killed by the first hail of arrows." This took all of them by surprise. "The battle went on without me and the Militia won. The king thought the people wouldn't be able to handle the disappointing truth, so he declared I died in battle as a hero and gave me a fancy tomb to rest in."

"So you got a heroes burial, but didn't deserve it?" Robobot summarised.

"Yes," the skeleton sighed sadly.

"That's disgraceful." Ranger said. "A heroes burial is for those who gave their lives in service of their country." He looked away and added, "even if that country was England."

"You're right." Dan agreed. "But it wasn't over because one hundred years later Zarok returned. He used dark magic to steal peoples souls and raise the dead for his army, but that spell also raised me." Dan pointed out. "I had a second chance to live up to the legend and truly become the hero the people thought I was."

"Not many people get a second chance." Portia said.

"And I wasn't gonna waste it." Dan said firmly. "I fought hordes of zombies, imps, a ghost ship with a skeleton crew, shadow demons, Scarecrows, Guardians of the Graveyard, a Stained Glass Demon, the Ant Queen, the Pumpkin King, Stone Golems and a very grumpy old cave dragon."

"How the hell did you beat any of those things?" Saturn asked. "You're like skin and bones, but without the skin."

"With a lot of weapons." Dan began. "During my quest I was called to the Hall of Heroes. A place where heroes from history spend their time feasting, drinking and arm wrestling." He let out a sad sigh. "Since I wasn't a real hero in life, I couldn't go there. But they took notice of my second chance and when I proved myself, they each gave me a weapon to fight Zoraks forces."

"What kind of weapons?" Brad asked.

"Well when I first awoke I had a short sword, a copper shield, a club and some throwing daggers I found inside my crypt." Dan showed them. "But I gained a crossbow, a war hammer, a broadsword, an axe, a longbow, a flaming longbow, a magic longbow, a spear, gold shield, magic sword even lightning bolts."

"Really?" Saturn rubbed his chin. "Be right back!" He ran back into the mansion.

"That cant be good." Robobot speculated.

"Maybe we can finish the interview before he gets back." Rex looked at the resume.

"What happened to your jaw?" Brad asked and the League braced themselves for the answer.

"It fell off." Dan said simply.

"… that, that's it?" Ranger raised an eyebrow. "was kind of expecting a fight against monsters or something."

The skeleton just shrugged. "It happened while I was dead in the crypt. I wonder if its still there?" He wondered out loud.

"Well then," everyone turned to see the Ultra Saturn armor standing in the doorway. "Then lets see it!"

"My jaw?" Dan blinked. "I as long as nothing ran away with it."

"What? No. I thought you said something else." Saturn used the thrusters to jump over the tables and land across from Dan. "Lets see if you can actually use any of those weapons."

"Ok sure," Rex shrugged.

"Wait, your really gonna let this happen?" Portia looked at the subtopian in surprise.

"Well its not like this is a surprise anymore." Rex said. "Besides, that armor should at least keep Saturn from being seriously hurt this time."

"Not only will it be fun to watch, we'll get to see Sir Fortesques combat skills in action." Lex pointed out.

Saturn raised his fists. "Bring it Skelletor!"

Dan looked at the others then shrugged, "fine." He dashed forward, sword and shield in hand.

Saturn swung a couple of punches but Dan blocked them with his shield before slashing the armor. Saturn used the thrusters to jump several feet backwards. "That all you go-" he was cut off as a dagger hit his shoulder. "A dagger?" He laughed, but was then hit by multiple daggers. "Hey!" Dan drew his club and struck Saturn in the head with a loud clank. Dan hit him repeatedly until the club shattered, knocking Saturn to the ground with its final strike. "Ow! I mean, Ha! Your club couldn't hold up to my armor, so I took the hits to wear it out."

"Yeah, none of us are buying you had a plan." Lex deadpanned.

"Now whatcha gonna do?" Saturn challenged. Dan smirked and brought out his war hammer making Saturn's eyes widen. "Oh shit." He used the thrusters to get to his feet and avoid the strike. But he was still knocked off his feet by the shockwave. "Take this!" He opened fire with his mini ring launchers and Dan blocked them with his shield, but the shield eventually fell apart. Dan quickly jumped behind a statue, drew his crossbow returned fire. The arrows hit another statue, bouncing off it and hitting Saturn. "Damn it!"

"Hell of a shot." Rex observed.

Saturn used the armors strength to lift a statue and throw it at Dan, but his used a silver shield to block it. Saturn resumed firing rings at him. Dan threw his axe, destroying the ring launcher on his right arm, "That's fine. One arms all I need." The axe came back and destroyed the other. "Mother F***er!"

"Boomerang axe!" Cooch gasped as the axe returned to Dans hand.

"The weapons design implies nothing as to how that is possible." Robobot said.

"Who cares?" The cat asked. "Its awesome!"

"Is that all you got?" Saturn challenged. He was them bombarded with arrows from Dans longbow. Saturn steadied himself and challenged again, "is that all you got?" He was then bombarded by flaming arrows. Saturn angrily pulled the arrows out. "Is that all yo-," he was cut off as Dan bombarded with magic arrows. "Is that-"

"For f***s shake!" Lex snapped. "Stop asking!"

Saturn used his thrusters to launch himself at Dan raised his shield to block Saturns punch. Saturn continued to swing wildly at the Skeleton who continued to block the strikes until one thrusters power punch caused the shield to fall apart. "HA! Now your boney ass is mine." He used his thrusters to charge at Dan who jumped high to avoid him. When he landed, Saturn used his thrusters to back flip over Dan.

"Big mistake." Dan drew his spear and threw it, hitting the armors left thrusters.

"What the hell!?" Saturn cried out as he lost control and flew towards the Leagues tables before hitting the ground in front of them. "Thrusters are busted, Damn it!" He looked to Brad and gestured to the spear still sticking in his back. "A little help?"

"If we take out the spear will you stop being an jackass and let us get on with the interview?" Rex asked.

"Argh, fine!" Saturn groaned. Brad reached over, grabbed the spear and yanked it out. "Thanks, now back to kicking your ass!" he ran back to Dan.

"Saturn no- God damn it!" Rex snapped.

"Yeah, we really should have expected that." Robobot pointed out.

"Time for the big guns!" Saturn activated the missile launchers in the suits shoulders. "Suck on these!" He launched the missiles but Dan drew his gold shield and they exploded against it, protecting the skeleton.

Purple lightning gathered in Dans hand. "My turn." He zapped Saturn with the lightning.

"Huh," Ranger blinked. "So he did say lightning."

The Ultra Saturn armor was smoking from its electrocution. "Now I'm pissed! Activate Kitchen Sink Protocol!" Dozens of compartments opened up, revealing missiles ready to fire.

"Ah Saturn?" Portia called out. "Maybe you should dial it back a little."

"No way! I'm all in baby!" With that Saturn fired every single missile he had.

Dans eye widened, "uh oh." The missiles exploded in fireballs as the League covered their eyes from the blasts.

"I WON!" Black Saturn cheered.

Rex was about to yell at him when his titan senses picked up something inside the smoke. Once it cleared, Dan stood there in his Dragon armor and was completely unharmed. "Ta Da!"

"Whoa." Brad said with wide eyes.

"I got this armor by defeating a fierce dragon in a cave. Not only does it make me fireproof, it lets me do this!" Dan unleashed a stream of fire directly onto Black Saturn.

"SHIT! SHIT! SHIT!" He cried as damage readings from the suit came in as it was now on fire. He ran around the yard until the flames were put out by Robobot.

"Fascinating." He scanned the damages. "It will be interesting to study while I repair the suit." They turned to see Dan now wielding his magic sword. "Or build a new one." The robot quickly ran back to his seat.

Dan used his Daring Dash to shoulder charge Saturn and then fiercely slashed him with his sword multiple times. He pulled back the sword and charged up an attack. He swung the blade slashing Saturn, but Dans top half spun around 360 degrees several times, slashing Saturn each time. When Dan stopped his attack, the Ultra Saturn armor was shutting down from all the damage it received.

"Not cool." Saturn said before falling backwards to the ground.

The rest of the League applauded. "Awesome! Impressive. Nicely done solider."

"How'd you spin you body like that?" Lex asked.

"Being a skeleton has some advantages." Dan said.

"No kidding." Portia nodded. "You've got a lot of muscle to use some of those weapons."

"I'm a lot stronger than I look." Dan smiled and attempted to flex his boney arm.

"What other abilities does your skeletal body grant you?" Robobot asked.

"Well I can survive having my head removed." Dan began. "I don't need food or water. But I can still eat and taste, thought I'm not sure how," he tapped the spot where his jaw should be. "The magic that animates my body makes me pretty tough, but if I take too much damage I go from being undead, to normal dead."

"Can I play with your crossbow?" Cooch asked.

"No," Dan shook his head.

Ranger raised an eyebrow. "Are you going to try and eat our flesh and or brains?"

"Eww," The skeleton winched, "no."

"So what happened to this Zarok?" Rex asked.

"After fighting my way through his army until I finally confronted him in his lair." Dan began. "There I was confronted by his personal guard and his champion, Lord Kardok. He was a skeleton like me, but evil with a flaming mace and riding a giant flaming horse skeleton."

"Lame!" Saturn yelled from inside his suit.

"He was tough but I still defeated him. With no one else to hide behind, Zarok decided to finally face me himself." Dan said. "By turning himself into a acid spiting, fire breathing, lightning shooting monster."

"Oh crap." Lex'es eyes widened.

"It took every weapon I had and every trick I'd learned, but I finally defeated Zarok and this time, he really was gone for good." Sir Foresque said with pride. "With him gone all of souls he'd stolen returned to people and freed them from his control. All of his monsters faded away and the dead returned to their graves, including me."

"Hold it!" Saturn pulled himself out of the wrecked armor. "I'm not done."

"Saturn maybe you should lay down?" Lex suggested.

"I'll lay down, when I take him down!" He pointed at Dan. "No more toys, lets see you fight me man to man!"

Dan stared at him for a moment, then tore off his left arm and threw it as Saturn, hitting him in the head and knocking him out. The arm then came back to Dan like a boomerang. Dan noticed the League looking at him as he reattached it. "I can also remove my arm and use it as a weapon. Though its not very strong."

"Seems strong enough to do the job." Ranger noted as he looked at Saturns unconscious body. "Tell me how doe- Cooch!"

The hyper evolved cat had left her seat and now holding Dans axe, "Cool!" She swung it around until she accidentally cut her hand with it. "OW!"

"Cooch this why your not supposed to play with sharp objects." Portia scolded her.

"I've got this." Dan held lightning in his hand again, but this time it was green. He zapped the cats hand and within a few seconds the cut was healed.

"Whoa," Cooch blinked.

"Good lightning," Dan smiled. "Unlike the kind I used on Saturn there, this can heal others. But at the cost of my own life energy."

"Best not to overuse it." Robobot noted.

"As I was saying, once Gallowmere was free I returned to my Crypt. I looked up at this stained glass window that showed me as a the hero of Gallowmere." Dan paused and smiled. "I had finally earned it, and truly become a Hero. When I lay down and returned to the after life, I awoke in the Hall of Heroes and was welcomed by them all."

"I've gotta say Sir Fortesque, I am impressed." Portia said. "You were given and second chance and you really did something with it."

"Well said Portia." Rex smiled. "Dan you earned your place inside the Hall of Heroes and now, you've earned your place inside the mansion. Sir Daniel Fortesque, welcome to the League of Freedom."

"YES!" Dan jumped in joy as the League clapped. "This is gonna be-"

"Hey chicken!" Cooch held up a chicken drumstick.

Dans eye widened. "NO!" He knocked the drumstick out of her hand.

"Hey!" The hyper evolved cat protested.

The drumstick landed on Black Saturn as he regained consciousness. "What?" He sniffed the air, "hey chicken!" The was a puff of smoke and when it cleared in Saturns place, was a roast chicken.

"What the hell?" Rex gasped as they all got out of their seats.

"What kind of spices were in that chicken?" Brad asked.

"I got those Chicken Drumsticks from the Witch of the Forrest." Dan said. "They turn enemies into roast chickens."

"Is Saturn still, alive?" Portia asked.

"He should turn back to normal soon." Dan assured them, "I think."

"Magic truly is an unpredictable medium." Robobot observed.

The League all looked down at the roast chicken that had been their team mate a few minutes ago.

"Okay I know this is really messed up," Lex spoke up, "but it smells really good."

"It really does." Ranger admitted.

Cooch raised her hand, "What if we just took a couple of bites?"

"NO!" everyone shouted.

 **I actually had no idea about the acronym. I want to thank King-Dorado for letting me know. For those of you wondering why I didn't include any details from the sequel "MediEvil 2", the Dan in this chapter was strictly from the 2019 PS4 remake. Oh and be sure to check out the new poll on profile.**


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